The Art of Losing Self

The Lord calls out... “Give me all of you!!! I don’t want so much of your time, so much of your talents and money, and so much of your work. I want you!!! All of you!! I have not come to torment or frustrate the natural man or woman, but to kill it! No half measures will do. I don’t want to only prune a branch here and a branch there; rather I want the whole tree out! Hand it over to me, the whole outfit, all of your desires, all of your wants and wishes and dreams. Turn them all over to me, give yourself to me and I will make of you a new self---in my image. Give me yourself and in exchange I will give you Myself. My will, shall become your will. My heart, shall become your heart.” - C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

As I “Give up [my]self... [I]will find [my] real self. Lose [my] life... [I] will save it. Submit to death, death of [my]ambitions and favorite wishes every day and death of [my]whole body and in the end submit with ever fiber of [my]being... [I]will find eternal life. [As I] Keep back nothing. Nothing that [I]have not given away will be really [mine]. Nothing in [me]that has not died will ever be raised from the dead...  [As I] look for Christ and [I]will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in.”  
― C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

-Alicia

"Unarmed"

In my studies this morning, I read Mosiah 20:26 where it says, "And when the Lamanites saw the people of Limhi, that they were without arms [or unarmed], they had compassion on them and were pacified towards them." I thought of this scripture in the Bible "A soft answer turneth away wrath; but greivous words stir up anger."- Proverbs 15:1

I have to ask myself, "How am I doing with my communication in my family?"  What does it look and sound like to be the kind of person whose knee-jerk reaction is to speak "unarmed"?

As I ask myself this question, I think, "Well, there are just those 'certain people' who are more difficult to communicate with than others.  They are the ones who to me seem to always be 'armed' at everyone else, as if no matter what anyone says or does they are loaded with criticism, ready to shoot insults, scathing remarks, or personal jabs."  How the heck am I supposed to communicate with those people "unarmed"?  How do I "end the conflict" and end it now?  I can't make them lay down their "weapons of war" but I can surrender mine.  Oh man, but this kind of humility for me is SO much easier said than done.

I think of Elder Wirthlin's talk from a few years ago.  It's one of my favorites:

"Each one of us will travel a different road during this life. Each progresses at a different rate. Temptations that trouble your brother may not challenge you at all. Strengths that you possess may seem impossible to another. Never look down on those who are less perfect than you.

We are all children of our Heavenly Father. And we are here with the same purpose: to learn to love Him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and to love our neighbor as ourselves.

When we are filled with kindness, we are not judgmental. The Savior taught, "Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven."  He also taught that "with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again." 

"But," you ask, "what if people are rude?"

Love them.

"If they are obnoxious?"

Love them.

"But what if they offend? Surely I must do something then?"

Love them.

"Wayward?"

The answer is the same. Be kind. Love them.

Why? In the scriptures Jude taught, "And of some have compassion, making a difference." 

Who can tell what far-reaching impact we can have if we are only kind?

My brothers and sisters, the gospel of Jesus Christ transcends mortality. Our work here is but a shadow of greater and unimaginable things to come...

...As our Heavenly Father loves us, we also should love His children.

May we be models of kindness. May we ever live up to the words of the Savior: "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another." Of these truths I bear witness in the sacred name of Jesus Christ, amen." 

- By Joseph B. Wirthlin, given April 2005

 I have so much to learn.  I'm grateful for another day to practice this kind of communication, this type of love, this kindness.  One of these days I'll get it down to an art.... practice, practice, practice!  I'm so thankful for a loving and patient Father in Heaven who gives me new opportunities to learn to be and do a little better than the day before.

-Alicia

Kénōsis

 I just learned in my religion class that in Christian theology, kenosis (κένωσις, ekénōsen) is  the Greek word for emptiness. It means the 'self-emptying' of one's own will in order to become entirely receptive to God's divine will.

Philippians 2:7 (KJV) says that Christ, "made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men."

In the American Standard Version it says: He "emptied himself, taking the form of a servant, being made in the likeness of men"

Christian's have long debated over Jesus's process of Kenosis.  What did it mean for Christ to "empty Himself"?  Did it mean he temporarily let go of who He was to take upon the form of man? Did it mean when  He "descended from the throne" He somehow descended in His godhood?  Of course not.  He understood His true identity and place as rightful King on earth and in heaven. His godhood and power never left Him spiritually but He gave up being recognized as such physically.

In fact, during the pinnacle crux of all human history, where His greatest "emptying" took place, is also where we see manifested the greatest and most magnificent power!!  In the Garden of Gethsemane He was emptied as He bled from every pore. (D&C 19:18) And on the cross blood and water "flowed from His side" (John 19:34)

Isaiah 53:12 also speaks of the Savior's emptying saying,"He [Christ] poured out His soul".  The highest majesty ever known was reveled through the most intense humility.

Psalms 36:9 describes Christ as "the fountain of life."  Living water "pouring out" in a constant steady flow.

Luke 8:43-48 tells another story of Christ's emptying:
"A woman having an issue of blood twelve years, which had spent all her living upon physicians, neither could be healed of any, came behind him, and touched the border of his garment: and immediately her issue of blood stanched.
And Jesus said, Who touched me?
When all denied, Peter and they that were with him said, Master, the multitude throng thee and press thee, and sayest thou, Who touched me?
And Jesus said, Somebody hath touched me: for I perceive that virtue is gone out of me."

Virtue had emptied out of Him.
"Virtue" here contextually means "strength."  He may have felt physically weak in that moment but He was certainly not weak in the spiritual sense.  He was "emptied" as in the context of Isaiah's illustration. The woman exercised such tremendous faith in Christ that when she reached to Him through the pressing crowd, He literally felt His body go weak from the "pouring out of His soul" to her and she was healed.

As the Savior emptied Himself, we too must empty ourselves.

Matt 16:25 teaches that when we "lose our self" we'll find ourselves.  This does not mean we lose our identity in the slightest.  In fact, as we choose to draw closer to Christ, we see our TRUE self, our Divine nature more and more defined, more clear than ever before.  What we DO lose however is the false identity, the labels and the lies the world would have us believe.

To "lose ourselves" we, like Him, must "pour out our souls".  Here, we show that He is the very center of our life, that we want Him more than anything else. As He prayed, we also pray, "Not my will but thine be done." (Luke 22:42)

In "emptying" ourselves of our own will, we "pour out" our souls, making room for Him to enter in.  This is the "whole tithe." We lay it all on the altar and say, "take it all, I surrender."  In return, He opens the windows of heaven, whether through temporal or spiritual needs, revelation, or guidance. The promise is heaven will be opened and poured out!

The New International Version of Malachi says it this way
"Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the Lord Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it." - Malachi 3:10

I love the imagery of "floodgates!"

He will "pour out" to us as we "pour out" Him.

Think of the results that come when we open ourselves up to Him in prayer:  We pour out all our strength - He gives us His strength, pour out all our hearts - He gives us His heart, pour out all our thoughts - He gives us His thoughts.  Fully and completely submissive and receptive, we open our self up to Him, we let Him in our heart and soul, receiving Him, becoming one with Him as He became one with the Father.

"In striving for ultimate submission, our wills constitute all we really have to give God anyway. The usual gifts and their derivatives we give to Him could be stamped justifiably “Return to Sender,” with a capital S. Even when God receives this one gift in return, the fully faithful will receive “all that [He] hath” (D&C 84:38). What an exchange rate!" - Neal A. Maxwell - Consecrate Thy Performance

I testify that Christ is the "fountain of Life", His love and power is ever flowing over.  He wants to "pour it into us."  But we must first go through our own kenosis, our own 'self-emptying' in order to be open to receive Him, all of Him.
-Alicia

To Know God

"More Of You"

by, Colton Dixon

I made my castle tall

I built up every wall

This is my kingdom and it needs to fall

I want you and no one else

Empty me of myself

Until the only thing that's left is

More of You

Less of me

Make me who I'm meant to be

You're all I want all I need

You're everything

Take it all I surrender

Be my king

God I choose

More of You and Less of me

I need more of you

More of you

This life I hold so close

Oh, God I let it go

I refuse to gain the world and lose my soul

So take it all I abandon everything I am

You can have it

The only thing I need is

More of You

Less of me

Make me who I'm meant to be

You're all I want all I need

You're everything

Take it all I surrender

Be my king

God I choose

More of You and Less of me

I need more of you

More of you

All to You

I surrender

All to You my blessed Savior

I surrender all

What is your Abrahamic trial?

I've been thinking for quite some time now about the principle of sacrifice in order to show our love, faith, and obedience to God.  Abraham was asked to lay down the life of his son that he loved, his son that he had dreamed of, hoped for, and waited 100 years to come into his life.  What would we be willing to lay down at our Father's feet saying, "You can take this.  As much as I love this and as much as this hurts, I am willing to lay this down because I love you more, Lord."

Abraham being willing to sacrifice his beloved son, Isaac, was  a similitude of God and his Only Begotten Son. - Genesis 22:1-14.

I wonder if Abraham found hope in God's request when he drew upon his previous revelation that he would have children as numerous as the stars in the sky?  Is that why he said to his son "God will provide the lamb"?

I woke up this morning with this song "Touch The Sky" playing in my head and thought about Abraham and his journey.  Every step up that mountain was a manifestation of his faith.  Isaac meant the world to him.  This was his life!  Yet, he was willing to let him go and say, "Lord, you can have him.  Take him and I will still praise and honor You."

What do you love more than anything and if God asked you to, would you be willing to lay it down for Him?

-Alicia

"Touch The Sky"

by, Hillsong United

What fortune lies beyond the stars

Those dazzling heights too vast to climb

I got so high to fall so far

But I found heaven as love swept low

My heart beating, my soul breathing

I found my life when I laid it down

Upward falling, spirit soaring

I touch the sky when my knees hit the ground

What treasure waits within Your scars

This gift of freedom gold can't buy

I bought the world and sold my heart

You traded heaven to have me again

My heart beating, my soul breathing

I found my life when I laid it down

Upward falling, spirit soaring

I touch the sky when my knees hit the ground

Find me here at Your feet again

Everything I am, reaching out, I surrender

Come sweep me up in Your love again

And my soul will dance

On the wings of forever

My heart beating, my soul breathing

I found my life when I laid it down

Upward falling, spirit soaring

I touch the sky when my knees hit the ground

Find me here at Your feet again

Everything I am, reaching out in surrender

Come sweep me up in Your love again

And my soul will dance

On the wings of forever

Upward falling, spirit soaring

I touch the sky

When my knees hit the ground

"Learn" and "Rest"

(Laying it on the Altar)

You Give and Take Away

"Blessed Be Your Name"

Blessed Be Your Name

In the land that is plentiful 

Where Your streams of abundance flow

Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name

When I'm found in the desert place

Though I walk through the wilderness

Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out 

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name

When the sun's shining down on me

When the world's 'all as it should be'

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name

On the road marked with suffering 

Though there's pain in the offering 

Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out 

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away

You give and take away

My heart will choose to say

Lord, blessed be Your name

by, Tree63
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2HYuQiruOio

Beautiful Heartache

I truly believe that through Christ "I can do all things."  I was given a blessing when I was 16 where I was told that I would "be tested" in this life, that I would have some heartaches and would need the comforting influence of the scriptures, the teachings of Christ and of God, [my] Eternal Father, to strengthen [me] that [I] may pass through these trials as Job did, with flying colors and with comfort."

So many times I have read those words, "you will have some heartaches" and have assumed they would come in the form of a difficult home environment, accidents, or illness... you know, "trials!"  For some reason I've always associated "heartache" to be the kind of pain one would never wish for, the kind one would want removed from from their life.  I never imagined anything that could hurt so bad would be something I'd actually pray to keep.

Job was tested in ways I cannot even begin to comprehend. Nevertheless, he did not sacrifice his integrity.  I love that word "integrity!"  It is another way of saying Job remained true no matter the circumstance, no matter the cost and always praised the name of the Lord.

This blessing given to me in my teenage years promises that in such tests "[I] will conquest them and [I] will not sacrifice [my] integrity".  I seek to make certain that is fulfilled.

 Job endured countless "heartaches" the pain of which I cannot comprehend.  But look at what incredible faith it produced!  Ultimately, that is what I want... faith like Job!  The Lord was His ultimate source for strength and through Him he was able to "endure all things" without sinning or charging God foolishly. -  Job 1:22

 The promises given to me have held true. "The influence of the scriptures, the teachings of Christ and of God" truly have brought me comfort in such trials!!  I testify of their unfailing power. They have brought me solace and peace in all of my heartaches... including the ones I like to call "beautiful."

- Alicia 

.................

Every fear, every doubt, all the pain I went through
Was the price that I paid to see this view
Now that I'm here I would never trade
The grace that I feel and the faith that I find
Through the bittersweet tears and the sleepless nights
I used to pray He'd take it all away
But instead it became
A beautiful heartbreak

I never dreamed my heart would make it
And I thought about turning around
But Heaven has shown me miracles
I never would have seen from the ground
Now I take the rain with the sunshine
Cause there's one thing that I know
He picks up the pieces
Along each broken road

- Beautiful Heartbreak by, Hilary Weeks 

Alma 7:11  -  He Knows!

“No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God … and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire”  - Elder Orson F. Whitney

Puzzle Piece Perspective

My dad used to always counsel me, "You can't see the forest for the trees."  As a young teenager, I didn't understand what he meant by that.  Of course, it's obvious to me now, he meant I lacked perspective.

I don't know how much I cared whether or not I had correct perspective back then, but now I hunger and thirst for it... I pray for it! I desire with all my heart to see clearly.  I want to see with the Spirit and not with my own eyes. - Jacob 4:13

I'm so thankful for prayer.  What an amazing listener our Father in Heaven is, I have so much to learn about that wonderful quality!  Prayer is my healing balm, my lifeline, my connection to my Truest Friend.  (Some may speculate in the ability to communicate with heaven but I've had too many experiences in my life that confirm the validity of prayer and I cannot deny it.)  My questions need answers, my soul needs direction, my hurt needs healing, my eyes need vision, my heart needs changing, and I know He is mighty to bless me with all of this and more.

The Savior taught: “Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, which is right, believing that ye shall receive, behold it shall be given unto you” (3 Ne. 18:20). “Pray always, and I will pour out my Spirit upon you, and great shall be your blessing” (D&C 19:38).

The Apostle James encourages, “The … fervent prayer of a righteous [person] availeth much” (James 5:16). 

What does fervent mean?  It means intense, sincere, impassioned, and heartfelt.  Have you had prayers like that, so intense that you feel as if the very flesh of your heart is being torn? I have.  It may not sound pleasant to some but I honestly cherish such moments in prayer only because I know I'm in the safest possible place to be so raw and exposed.

In the scriptures we are commanded to "pray always." How is this done? Alma 34:27 teaches us to keep our prayers in our hearts, “When you do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you.” 

Prayer is the key that unlocks the door of revelation.

President Boyd K. Packer counseled, "Learn to pray. Pray often. Pray in your mind, in your heart. Pray on your knees. Prayer is your personal key to heaven. The lock is on your side of the veil. And I have learned to conclude all my prayers with 'Thy will be done'" (Matthew 6:10; see also Luke 11:2; 3 Nephi 13:10).

In direct answer to my prayers yesterday, I was led straight to a talk from conference all about perspective.  Interesting that my Heavenly Father would give me the same counsel my earthly father gave me so many years ago.  I guess I still have a lot of growing up to do.

The story of my life is like a gigantic jigsaw puzzle.  Through prayer I have laid all the pieces across the table.  I graciously thank my loving Father in Heaven for the exciting opportunity of putting together this picture of my life with Him.  He watches over me and gives me help as I ask.  There's an amazing sense of satisfaction when I find pieces that snap perfectly into place, knowing just how and why they relate, revealing more of the bigger picture.

Then I have this group of other pieces; I know they are part of the puzzle, I've held them, examined them closely, and searched for their appropriate position.  I can see the colors and style of cut match with the overall puzzle. I know they belong in the big picture somehow, so I hang on to them. Sometimes I gaze at them for hours...  for the life of me, I cannot see how they can even be possible. I want to find their place!  Like a child, I grow frustrated and discouraged and cry out to my Father, "I don't want to deal with these pieces anymore! I don't know where they belong!"
He lovingly tells me, "Then don't try to make them fit right now, Alicia, and don't quit or throw these ones away either.   Keep putting together the pieces you do understand and one by one, over time, you will see exactly how these other ones belong in your life and you will know right where they go. Be patient."
This brought me comfort.  I pray for patience.

In this same talk Elder Rafael E. Pino shares a story about the raw marble and how the sculptor sees the finished piece:
"As the sculptor was chiseling a block of marble, a boy came every day and watched shyly. When the figure of David emerged and appeared from that stone, complete for all the world to admire, the boy asked Michelangelo, ‘How did you know he was in there?"

This was also what I needed to hear and caused me to recall the lyrics to my Masterpiece, the song I played over and over and memorized into my heart so many years ago.

I love how personal my Father in Heaven is.  I love and cherish the power of prayer.  I thank Him for His devotion to such an impatient soul.  He gently guides and lovingly listens.  He has provided me with His words through scripture, through His servants, and through the Spirit of revelation.  What an invaluable truth!

-Alicia

A Wise Investment

One of the biggest lies and falsehoods ever told to man is that you can buy anything in this world with money. But pure love is far richer than pure gold and it cannot be bought, neither can it be sold.  Pure love, like precious metals, can be discovered and refined on this earth but not exchanged from hand to hand only from heart to heart.  The wise understand the value of this commodity, because the purest love brings the purest joy.  It is not found in the stock market but in the investing, the exchanging, and the returning of Eternal bonds among our brothers and sisters, our mothers and fathers, our children and grandchildren. The truth is, if you spend your life chasing things that only money can buy: fashion, popularity, pleasures, and praise...  you will not only come up empty handed in the end, but empty hearted.

The purest love = sacrifice, especially that of one's self

-Alicia

"A selfless person is one who is more concerned about the happiness and well-being of another than about his or her own convenience or comfort, one who is willing to serve another when it is neither sought for nor appreciated, or one who is willing to serve even those whom he or she dislikes. A selfless person displays a willingness to sacrifice, a willingness to purge from his or her mind and heart personal wants, and needs, and feelings. Instead of reaching for and requiring praise and recognition for himself, or gratification of his or her own wants, the selfless person will meet these very human needs for others. Remember the words of the Savior as he taught his disciples on an occasion when personal recognition was being sought: “But Jesus called them to him, and saith unto them, … whosoever will be great among you, shall be your minister: And whosoever of you will be the chiefest, shall be servant of all. For even the son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.” (Mark 10:42–45.)
- H. Burke Peterson - Selflessness: A Pattern for Happiness

Learning CharACTer

When working through difficulties or particular challenges, how often have we heard the phrase, "This will be good for you, it builds character."

What is character?

It is the sum of the soul.  It is the qualities and attributes that make up one's personality, who they truly are. It is character that determines destiny, NOT appearances, prestige, popularity, or circumstance.  

How is character reveled within each of us?  Martin Luther King taught, "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."  

In Lectures on Faith, Joseph Smith described that one of the three things "necessary in order that any rational and intelligent being may exercise faith in [the Father and Son] unto life and salvation is a correct idea of [Their] character, perfections, and attributes:" (page 33)

How do we gain a correct idea of the character of Christ?  We observe and study His life and His teachings... but there's more to learning than just studying, it must also be by faith. - D&C 109:7

"Faith is a principle of action... Faith in Jesus Christ is the first principle of the gospel and is more than belief, since true faith always moves its possessor to some kind of physical and mental action."

 -Bible Dictionary 

There's an old saying that you never truly understand a person until you've walked a mile in their shoes.  In order to understand the character of Christ, we must "walk a mile" in His shoes, we must try to be like Him in whatever circumstances.  Learning to walk in the footsteps of the Savior doesn't happen overnight.  The Lord is patient with us just as a father is patient with his children when they attempt to take their first steps.  Every time they stumble, he encourages them to keep trying and his heart is overjoyed with every success.  It requires constant effort and God is proud of all who are sincerely and genuinely doing their best.   

Learning the character of Christ requires acting out what we learn.  And in order to "act" out what we have learned from our great Teacher, we must be given circumstances that test us and try us.  Because of this knowledge, I am grateful for the challenges that confront me.  Challenges are opportunities for me to exercise my agency, to practice in faith/action what I have learned by study.  

Learning the CharACTer of Christ comes from acting as He would act, from practicing over and over what He would do.   

I am genuinely grateful for a loving Father in Heaven who is incredibly patient with me.  He doesn't scorn me when I stumble but sees it as a "good fall" because he sees my heart, He sees I'm trying.  The faith He places in me stirs within my soul a greater love and admiration for His character, I have a greater desire to become as He is.  So I'll keep learning, keep practicing, keep trying, and through His amazing grace, I won't just walk, I'll run!

"Live your life to be a good example of what you believe—in word and deed. How we live our religion is far more important than what we may say about our religion.

Our Savior’s Second Coming is drawing nearer. Let us not delay in this great cause. Remember Captain Moroni, who hoisted the title of liberty inscribed with the words “In memory of our God, our religion, and freedom, and our peace, our wives, and our children.”  Let us remember the people’s response: exercising their agency, they “came running together” with a covenant to act.

My beloved brothers and sisters, don’t walk! Run! Run to receive the blessings of agency by following the Holy Ghost and exercising the freedoms God has given us to do His will." 

- Elder Robert D. Hales

(Also see - The transforming Power of Faith and Character by, Richard G. Scott)

One thing I really love about this video is it's not just a loving father who encourages but also loving brothers and sisters.  How thankful I am for my brothers and sisters in the Gospel who cheer and inspire me every step of the way. Oh how I love them!

-Alicia

The Need To Breathe

 It is said that a dispassionate young man approached the Greek philosopher and casually said, "O great Socrates, I come to you for knowledge."

The philosopher took the young man down to the sea, waded in with him, and then dunked him under the water for thirty seconds.

When he let the young man up for air, Socrates asked him to repeat what he wanted. "Knowledge, O great one," he sputtered.

Socrates put him under the water again, only this time a little longer.

After repeated dunkings and responses, the philosopher asked, "What do you want?" The young man finally gasped, "Air. I want air!"

"Good," answered Socrates. "Now, when you want knowledge as much as you wanted air, you shall have it.

.................

I must have been about 18 or 19 when I discovered the song, "Masterpiece" by, Julie De Azevedo.  I fell in love with the lyrics because they expressed so perfectly the feelings I had in my own heart.  I listened to it so much that I could have sung it in my sleep.  This song is my soul's most sincere desire. I want to know my Father in Heaven's will for me, I want it written on my heart.  I want to become who He would have me become!!  I need this like I need to breathe.

- Alicia

.................

Masterpiece

Simple clay in a potter's hand, an empty page and an author's pen,
An artist's brush to a canvas white, and a work of art comes to life.
Marble raw, but the sculptor sees, the masterpiece that lies beneath.
Though rough and marred the Master's touch, will change this life, into his work of love.
So everyday I pray...

He'll write His will upon my heart, Mold my soul to His design,
Adding color depth and light, And polishing until I shine shine shine!
Oh my heart is in His hands, He's painting the life He'd have me lead.
Through refining floods and flames, He's smoothing edges and the seams,
And in time time time, Oh this simple life will be ....
A Masterpiece

Snowy peaks, water-color skys, His works of beauty fill my eyes
But He sees nothing more beautiful than a heart submissive to His will

I want to know His will!

So everyday I pray...
He'll write His will upon my heart, Mold my soul to His design,
Adding color depth and light, And polishing until I shine shine shine!
Oh my heart is in His hands, He's painting the life He'd have me lead.
Through refining floods and flames, He's smoothing edges and the seams,
And in time time time, Oh this simple life will be ....
A Masterpiece
My Master's Masterpiece

- Julie De Azevedo

My Prayer

My Prayer 

Fill my mind with virtue, 

Keep it free from sin. 

Fill my heart with love unfeigned, 

Root out bitterness within. 

May my lips be seared 

From any unkind word, 

Let Thy Spirit guide my tongue 

So angels can be heard. 

Keep me from complaint, 

From ever wanting more. 

Help me see all that I have 

And all that lies in store. 

Open up my ears to hear 

Thy will for me this day. 

Seal my wandering heart to Thee 

And never let me stray. 

Bless my hands with power 

To lift those hanging down. 

Fill my soul with Thy light, 

Make my smile turn their frown. 

Keep my feet upon the path 

That leads me straight to Thee. 

Let me walk with confidence, 

Trusting all I cannot see. 

Strip me from my foolish pride, 

From all desire for praise. 

Help me bring souls unto Christ 

Give Him glory all my days.

By, Alicia Rawlins

2011

Must Be Opposition In All Things

I gave a lesson for the young women of my Church last Sunday.  We also used it as a family lesson the following night.  This whole month I have been thinking of the talks that were suggested in the lesson plan and the quotes that were referenced therein.

The first quote is by President Spencer W. Kimball
"There are great challenges ahead of us, giant opportunities to be met. I welcome that exciting prospect and feel to say to the Lord, humbly, 'Give me this mountain,' give me these challenges."

I asked the young women and my children the same question:
"Why do you think President Kimball wants 'these challenges'?  Notice, not only does he want them but he says he 'welcome[s] that exciting prospect'.  What is he, nuts? Why would someone call challenges exciting?"

Our current Prophet, President Thomas S. Monson shared the other thing I've been thinking of all month.  He read a portion of this poem I've heard many times before.

Good Timber

The tree that never had to fight
For sun and sky and air and light,
But stood out in the open plain
And always got its share of rain,
Never became a forest king
But lived and died a scrubby thing.

The man who never had to toil
To gain and farm his patch of soil,
Who never had to win his share
Of sun and sky and light and air,
Never became a manly man
But lived and died as he began.

Good timber does not grow with ease:
The stronger wind, the stronger trees;
The further sky, the greater length;
The more the storm, the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.

Where thickest lies the forest growth,
We find the patriarchs of both.
And they hold counsel with the stars
Whose broken branches show the scars
Of many winds and much of strife.
This is the common law of life.

-Douglas Malloch

An ancient prophet in the New Testament also shared his testimony of joy and beauty through adversity, "No chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grevious: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby." - Hebrews 12:11

All three of these righteous men are testifying that beautiful, "joyous", "peaceable", wonderful things come out of pressing through our opposition, through our adversity.

Joseph Smith was another who had trials I cannot even begin to fathom.
He received this promise in Liberty Jail, "if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good." - D&C 122:7

It's that word, "EXPERINCE" that strikes me, what we learn, what we gain, what we come to know as we go through and faithfully endure these challenges.  These prophets who have shared the beauty that can come of opposition are speaking from their own experiences.  I believe they know what it is first hand to cry out with the most soulful tears, with heart-wrenching agony over the sorrows that dig trenches in their hearts. They know what it means to pray and to "pray more earnestly".  They have anxiously sought for answers through the scriptures and turned to the word of the Lord for guidance.  And I am certain that every one of them have in their searching for answers, hope, and healing came to appreciate more fully the One Who carried all our suffering and descended below all things.

All of these ingredients: "soulful prayer", "serious study of the scriptures," and "seeking the Savior" work in us something amazing and beautiful.  It opens up our hearts to receive His Spirit and as we receive this Spirit within us we are changed into "new creatures".  Through this process, we witness over and over again the reality of God because we see undeniable, direct answers to our prayers.  We feel and experience for ourselves the reality of heaven.  This mountain we have climbed, however painful, has opened our "vision".  We see the bigger picture now, not just for our own lives but for others as well.  We WANT to "lift up the hands that hang down and strengthen the feebled knees." We have become converted, transformed, with new eyes, a new heart, and a new Spirit within us!  Like Jacob, our faith becomes "unshakeable".

I can see clearly from my own experiences why President Kimball said, "'Give me this mountain,' give me these challenges."  Through my adversities I have come to know my Father in Heaven and His Son, Jesus Christ.  Through these trials I have gained an appreciation for the strong shoulders of my Savior.  He is able!!!  I have found that this is the way to eternal life.  This is the fruit of the tree.  And a testimony like this worth every effort for it is "sweet above all that is sweet."

I humbly thank my Father for His infinite wisdom. And I am deeply thankful that He loves me enough to provide for me opposition and challenges. I too, welcome them.

-Alicia

Song of the Day - "I'm Letting Go!"

Because I've always got to have a song of the day...

This one is perfect-o!

"I'm Letting Go"

My heart beats, standing on the edge

But my feet have finally left the ledge

Like an acrobat

There's no turning back

I'm letting go

Of the life I planned for me

And my dreams

Losing control

Of my destiny

Feels like I'm falling and that's what it's like to believe

So I'm letting go

This is a giant leap of faith

Trusting and trying to embrace

The fear of the unknown

Beyond my comfort zone

I'm letting go

Of the life I planned for me

And my dreams

Losing control

Of my destiny

Feels like I'm falling and that's what it's like to believe

So I'm letting go

Giving in to your gravity

Knowing You are holding me

I'm not afraid

Feels like I'm falling and that's what it's like to believe

Feels like I'm falling and this is the life for me

The Tree of Life / The Love of God

I've been thinking a lot about this part of The Living Christ.
"Each of us will stand to be judged of Him according to our works and the desires of our hearts."

What are the "desires of our hearts"?

In the Thesaurus, I find it interesting that "desires" is also tied with "appetites and passions".  So the phrase from The Living Christ to be expounded a little bit more could say, "each of us will stand to be judged of Him according to our works and the desires [appetites and passions] of our hearts."

What is it that we are passionate about?
What is it that we are hungry for?
What is our motivation?
The Savior was passionate about building the Kingdom of God, He was hungry for instruction from His Father, He was motivated by the purest love. And because His motives were of the purest kind, it naturally followed that He willingly stayed within the bounds His Father had set, it naturally followed that He was obedient to whatever the will of the Father was for Him.

All of these thoughts go right along with a talk I gave a while ago.  I found that I had a copy of it, so I've pasted it here.

.....................

(Copy of a talk I originally gave in church on Dec. 22nd, 2013)

The Tree of Life / The Love of God

Most of us are familiar with Lehi’s vision of the tree of life, you know the one… the iron rod, the midst of darkness, the field, and the great and spacious building:

I love 1Nephi 11 where Nephi desires to know the meaning of his father, Lehi’s dream.  As he was praying and pondering in his heart the Spirit of the Lord comes to him. And he asks Nephi “What desirest thou?”  Nephi says, “to know the meaning of the dream my father had.”
(Notice right after he says this, the spirit immediately turns Nephi’s focus to the tree of life by asking him, “do you believe  that your father saw  the  tree?” Nephi says yes, that he believes.)

Then, Nephi sees in vision this glorious, most beautiful tree with the fruit thereof most desirable. And the Spirit of the Lord asks him again, “What desirest thou?”  He says, “To know the interpretation thereof.”
He is then  shown a vision of Mary, the mother of Christ, holding in her arms the infant Son of God, the Savior of the world.   The Spirit of the Lord asks him a vital question, “Knowest thou the condescension of God ?”

Do we know the condescension of God? Do we know Who He is and realize the magnitude of His choice to “descend below all things”?

Listen to these two descriptions of the Savior:

 Under the direction of the Father, He is the very Creator of the Heavens and the earth!!!  “All things were made by Him and without Him was not anything made.” (John 1:3) The tree in Lehi’s dream is described as "exceeding all beauty, most precious above all, most desirable!” He is all-powerful, all-knowing, "the Mighty God, the Everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace," The Savior or the world. -Isaiah 9:6

Now listen to the first couple of verses in Isaiah 53- and this description of how many of the people would view Him. (I’m paraphrasing)

 “a scrawny seedling, a scrubby plant in a parched field. nothing attractive about him, nothing to cause us to take a second look. looked down on and passed over, not worth our time or attention”. He was viewed as inferior, lower, less than, spit upon, despised, rejected and hated. - Isaiah 53:2-3

Wait a minute?
We’re talking about the same person here?
What happened?  How could one so perfect, so amazing, so Mighty be viewed as one so inferior, hated and rejected?

The answer is "The people were blinded."
 By what? What was it that was blinding them?

1 Nephi 13:8 & 9,  Mormon 8:38, 39 – tell us the cause of their visual impairment….both of these references say, ”for the praise of the world.”  Their desires all stemmed from selfishness.  All they cared about was "getting glory for themselves".

Yes, sometimes the limelight isn’t always what it’s cracked up to be… sometimes the limelight can be blinding.

Twice, this past Sunday, I heard reference to a story called “The Mansion”, a story about a man and his downfall because he sought all his life for the honor and praise of the world.  Whether we are rich or poor, we must beware of valuing and centering our lives around the honors, the praise and approval of mankind …. For in doing so, we may be blinded and overlook the Divine, even the very
Savior of the world.

Now I go back to the question, “knowest thou the condescension of God?”

Condescension means = Voluntary descent from rank, voluntary descent from dignity. Letting go of deserved honors; submission to inferiors in granting requests, or performing acts which strict justice does not require.

So often all that is hailed, applauded, awarded or paraded in accolades or accomplishments is NOT where we will find true greatness.  It is found in the depths of the heart. Remember: "he that is greatest among you shall be your servant." (Matt 23:11)

I ask the question then “why?”  Why would one so glorious and noble, worthy of all praise,  willingly,  voluntarily relinquish His throne and descend to the sphere of man? He’s the creator of the earth, the Lord and Savior of us all, the King of Kings… shouldn't He have been the most loved, the most recognized, appreciated, praised, revered and admired? YES, but He wasn’t and, sadly, He isn’t… and knew He wouldn’t be… because that wasn’t His motive.  His motive never has been about “what He deserves or recognition.”  His motive was LOVE, sincere pure love for God our Father, and love for us!

Brothers and sisters, behold the condescension of God:

"Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
 But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was  bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace  was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.
 All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the LORD hath laid on him the iniquity of us all." (Isaiah 53:4-6)

 "And he [went] forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.

 And he [took] upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he [took] him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities." (Alma 7:11-12) 

And He did  all this without any thought for Himself!…. Why?  Because , “Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,” 1 Corinthians 13:4

Brothers and Sisters, there really is no need to draw attention to ourselves. We are God’s children! We have His full attention!  We are already loved and already noticed..   I testify that the Lord of Heaven and Earth, knows all, is above all, and sees all! And Who is greater than the Lord? I witness to you that there is none that is greater!

I testify that as we “lose ourselves”, as we take our focus off of ourselves and instead focus on Christ, focus on His words in the scriptures and through living Prophets, focus on our Savior’s example of love, our eyes will be opened!  We will be free from the anxiety that accompanies pride, the concern of what others think of us, the pride that blinds us.  When we put the Lord first, where He deserves to be, and sincerely reach out to all others as the Savior did, without "rustling for recognition"* or praise, but because of the pure love of Christ flowing through us, then we will have eyes to see… it is here we will find true satisfaction, fulfillment, and lasting joy.

 This is the Spirit of Christmas…. The Spirit of Christ!  Of this I testify, in the name of Jesus Christ,

Amen.

……

*From a talk by Elder Neal A. Maxwell entitled, “The Pathway of Dicipleship” 1998 BYU Education Week – “Be grateful, therefore, for the gospel’s emphasis on meekness. Be careful of the natural man’s milder expressions—craving for credit and rustling for recognition. Alas, so often the hearts and even the moral agency of others can be crushed in the search for self-glorification.”

I want patience, and I want it now!

I'm in Mosiah 23 in my personal studies.  I came across this verse yesterday,
"...the Lord seeth fit to chasten [you, Alicia]; yea, He trieth [your] patience and [your] faith."

Yep, that's exactly how I read it, with my own name in there and everything.  As I did so, another scripture came into my mind in a personal way,

"For [you, Alicia] have need of patience, that after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise."

I feel like saying, "I know, Lord, I know.  I am terribly impatient!  So how about imparting that gift of patience to me right now eh?!  ;) "

I came into this world seven weeks before I was due, so I guess you could say I was born impatient.
I was the little girl who on family vacations would need my parents to pull off to the side of the road every 20 minutes so I could pee.
 I'm the girl who took piano from age 6 to 12 and have nothing to show for it because I  didn't have the patience to keep practicing. (I remember spending more time hanging upside-down on the piano bench with my feet on the keys, staring out at the living room, imagining myself walking on the ceiling).
When I was seven, I couldn't contain emotions around my childhood crush any longer, I tackled him, pinned his arms to the ground and planted a ginormous kiss on his face (then I ran and hid).
When I was sixteen, I pulled into a Chevron with a car full of my drama friends, I was so excited to go to the cast party with everyone that I forgot to put the nozzle back on the pump, drove away, and ripped it clean off the hose. (My friends still haven't let me live that down.  You should have seen the clerks face when I handed him the nozzle. Priceless!!)
And I can't even begin to list all the books I've read only half-way through because I was too impatient to finish them.
The one that takes the cake though is that it took exactly 16 weeks for me to marry my husband.  Yep, exactly 16 weeks from the very first date (blind date) to the day of our wedding.  (And anyone who knows my husband will know that making fast decisions, especially in regards to really big decisions, are NOT in his nature.)

Yes, I'm in desperate need of patience.  *Sigh*

The words from my favorite talk by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland rings in my ears:

"It is simply a truism that nothing very valuable can come without significant sacrifice and effort and patience on our part....

Troilus, whose impatient love for Cressida makes him something of a basket case, teaches us a valuable lesson. 
“He that will have a cake out of the wheat must tarry the grinding,” Pandarus says to Troilus. 
“Have I not tarried?” Troilus pouts.

Pandarus: Ay, the grinding; but you must tarry the bolting.

Troilus: Have I not tarried?

Pandarus: Ay, the bolting; but you must tarry the leavening.

Troilus: Still have I tarried?

Pandarus: Ay, to the leavening; but here’s yet . . . the kneading, the making of the cake, the heating of the oven, and the baking; nay, you must stay the cooling too, or you may chance to burn your lips.

[Troilus and Cressida, act 1, scene 1, lines 14ff]

The baking of life’s best cakes takes time. Don’t despair of tarrying and trying. And don’t “burn your lips” with impatience."  - Jeffery R. Holland - (However Long and Hard the Road)

It is true, the best things take time.  I can pray for patience but the Lord cannot give it to me.  Patience is not something to be given but to be grown.  However, He can give me experiences that will help me cultivate this wonderful virtue.  I'll admit that some of the experiences He gives are extremely painful.  It makes sense though," no pain / no gain." A blessing I've discovered is that the Lord can enable me to feel grateful in the present moments, the waiting isn't so hard and time goes by so much faster when "I'm anxiously engaged in [the best] causes."

Elder Neal A. Maxwell explained in a powerful talk "Endure It Well",
"Paul observed, “Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness.” (Heb. 12:11.) Such “peaceable fruit” comes only in the appointed season thereof, after the blossoms and the buds.

Otherwise, if certain mortal experiences were cut short, it would be like pulling up a flower to see how the roots are doing. Put another way, too many anxious openings of the oven door, and the cake falls instead of rising. Moreover, enforced change usually does not last, while productive enduring can ingrain permanent change. (See Alma 32:13–16.)

Patient endurance is to be distinguished from merely being “acted upon.” Endurance is more than pacing up and down within the cell of our circumstance; it is not only acceptance of the things allotted to us, it is to “act for ourselves” by magnifying what is allotted to us. (See Alma 29:3, 6.)"

We must always remember that we are in the process of becoming something so much more.  We must make a strong effort to "give thanks in all things" and avoid becoming bitter when the road is long. We press ahead, and we do so with songs of praise every step of the way.

"Therefore, true enduring represents not merely the passage of time, but the passage of the soul—and not merely from A to B, but sometimes all the way from A to Z. To endure in faith and doeth God’s will. (See D&C 63:20; D&C 101:35) therefore involves much more than putting up with a circumstance." - Neal A. Maxwell

I believe that circumstances don't determine our happiness rather the truly happy make a conscious decision to choose happiness regardless of their circumstances.  And I believe the key to this is enduring faith and gratitude.  I don't know what the future holds, but I know Who holds the future.

I am truly thankful for all the Lord gives me so that I may grow patience.  I know the fruit born of it will be that of the sweetest kind and it will be well worth the wait. Isaiah 40:31

-Alicia

I give it all in surrender.

"Lift My Life Up" by, Unspoken
.......

You brought me this far so why would I question You now

You have provided so why would I start to doubt

I've never been stranded, abandoned or left here to fight alone

So I'm giving You control

I lift my life, lift my life up

I give it all in surrender

I lift my heart, lift my heart up

You can have it forever

All my dreams, all my plans

Lord I leave it in Your hands

I lift my life, lift my life up

Have Your way in me

Have Your way in me

If peace is a river then let it sweep over me

If I'm under fire I know it's refining me

When I hear You calling out I follow now wherever the road may go

I know You're leading me home

I lift my life, lift my life up

I give it all in surrender

I lift my heart, lift my heart up

You can have it forever

All my dreams, all my plans

Lord I leave it in Your hands

I lift my life, lift my life up

Have Your way in me

Have Your way in me

Take my life and let it be all for You

Take my life and let it be all for You

I lift my life, lift my life up

I give it all in surrender

I lift my heart, lift my heart up

(Take my life)

I lift my life, lift my life up

I give it all in surrender

(Take my heart)

I lift my heart, lift my heart up

You can have it forever

All my dreams, all my plans

Lord I leave it in Your hands

I lift my life, lift my life up

Have Your way with me

Have Your way with me

Have Your way with me

Have Your way with me

Take my life and let it be all for You

........

"Every one of us is more beloved to the Lord than we can possibly understand or imagine. Let us therefore be kinder to one another and kinder toward ourselves. Let us remember that as we wait upon the Lord, we are becoming “saint[s] through [His] atonement, … submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon [us], even as a child doth submit to his father.”^{36 - Elder Robert D. Hales - Waiting upon the Lord: Thy will be done}

God Will Lift Us Up

We all face adversity. It is the common thread among the entire human family.  It is part of our mortal probation.  Some struggles and challenges may be obvious to others while some may be silent battles fought in the solitary chambers of the heart.  However this adversity comes is not what matters most, but rather how we come out of it.  God will test us and try us to prove our faithfulness.

 Sometimes the tests we face will come in ways that we never would have expected, and in such circumstances we may discover weaknesses we never realized we had.  How painful these discoveries can be!  But it is a loving Father who shows us them.  We might question our ability to endure and endure faithfully.  Regardless of how much we doubt our own abilities, the spiritual stamina we seek will grace us as we submit to the Lord and surrender our will to His.  

Our most difficult challenges may come at the realization that what we so desperately want for ourselves may not be what the Lord wants for us.  If this is the case, then so be it.  "Greater is He that is in [us]." He will lift us up.  Do we believe this?   He will lead us right.  We can trust this truth with full faith and confidence and do as Elder Holland has said; 

"Go forward. Don’t fear, don’t vacillate, don’t quibble, don’t whine... With the spirit of revelation, dismiss your fears and wade in with both feet. In the words of Joseph Smith, “...Go forward and not backward. Courage, brethren; and on, on to the victory!” (D&C 128:22).

I bear witness of the God of Glory, of the redeeming Son of God, of light and hope and a bright future. I promise you that God lives and loves you, each one of you, and that he has set bounds and limits to the opposing powers of darkness. I testify that Jesus is the Christ, the victor over death and hell and the fallen one who schemes there. The gospel of Jesus Christ is true, and it has been restored, just as we have sung and testified this morning.

“Fear ye not.” And when the second and the third and the fourth blows come, “fear ye not. . . . The Lord shall fight for you.” “Cast not away therefore your confidence.”

This video was on the Young Women lesson page.  I love the promises the apostles give in this clip.  I believe these promises with all of my soul.  

I also love this girl's incredible example of facing her challenges in such a way that she grows greater in love, greater in compassion, greater in patience, and ultimately greater in Christ.  I want that kind of heart!

-Alicia

Be Thou My Vision

I believe there are pivotal stages and transitional ages, as we grow into maturity: Birth (0), the age of accountability (8), the age of adolescence (12), and the transition into adulthood (18).

As a mother, it is absolutely fascinating for me to watch my children move through different phases of their lives.  In an effort to capture these moments and help my children hold them sacred, I write each of them a special letter at each stage.  I do so to help them have a vision for who they are and the gifts they have been given.  I call these letters their "Mother's Blessing".

The year my oldest turned eight, my husband and I discussed that we not only wanted a vision for each of our children at these stages but a vision for our family as a whole.  We decided to write a mission statement of who we are and what it means to be a part of the Rawlins Team.  We refer to our family as a team a lot to help our children understand the importance of unity. We want them to understand that we work with and for each other, not against or in isolation.  We want our children to steer clear of competition among themselves and instead establish the habit of cheering for each teammate.  This is why the first line of our mission statement is, "We are a family of sincere listeners who champion each other."

I've been thinking of another line in our mission statement lately. "We choose to find the good in others and in ourselves, remembering always 'The worth of souls is great in the sight of God.'"

What does it mean to find the good?  Does it seem like a simple task?  Sometimes our vision gets cloudy and it is hard to see others with an eye of optimism and we fall into the destructive trap of nagging cynicism.  Now, there are times, especially as parents where it is absolutely essential we give correction or where something may need to be said to a spouse.  These things have to be done delicately and always in the spirit of love and prayer.  I've had plenty of moments in my life where I've had to apologize immediately for my poor way of correcting.

I firmly believe though that we will ultimately find what we look for.  If we look for faults in others, we will find them.  If we look for strengths and beauty, we will find them.  It is our choice!  "We choose to find the good..."

President Gordon B. Hinckley has said, "My plea is that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight.  I am suggesting that as we go through life, we 'accentuate the positive.' I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generouly compliment and endorse virtue and effort."

Whenever I read this quote, I can't help but think of the story in John where Jesus heals the blind man.  Perhaps it is because with my mortal limitations and my weaknesses, I don't always see the good.  I become blinded by my pride, I become too focused on myself, or what I deserve.  In these moments I pray, "Dear Father, please open my eyes, heal me of my blindness, help me to see what I am not seeing.  Give me a new heart, a fresh vision outside of myself.  Please give me eyes to see.  Help me to focus on the good."

This Sunday in our church choir we are singing the old Irish hymn, "Be Thou My Vision".  We will only be singing verses 1, 2, and 5.  I wish we could find an arrangement for verses 3 & 4 too because I love all the words to this entire hymn.


This song is my prayer!  It articulates the deepest desires of my heart.

"Be Thou My Vision"

1.  Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

2.  Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.

5.  High King of Heaven, my victory won,
May I reach Heaven’s joys, O bright Heaven’s Sun!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all.

...............

3.  Be Thou my battle Shield, Sword for the fight;
Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;
Thou my soul’s Shelter, Thou my high Tower:
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.

4.  Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,
Thou mine Inheritance, now and always:
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,
High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art.

.............

-Alicia