I believe there are pivotal stages and transitional ages, as we grow into maturity: Birth (0), the age of accountability (8), the age of adolescence (12), and the transition into adulthood (18).
As a mother, it is absolutely fascinating for me to watch my children move through different phases of their lives. In an effort to capture these moments and help my children hold them sacred, I write each of them a special letter at each stage. I do so to help them have a vision for who they are and the gifts they have been given. I call these letters their "Mother's Blessing".
The year my oldest turned eight, my husband and I discussed that we not only wanted a vision for each of our children at these stages but a vision for our family as a whole. We decided to write a mission statement of who we are and what it means to be a part of the Rawlins Team. We refer to our family as a team a lot to help our children understand the importance of unity. We want them to understand that we work with and for each other, not against or in isolation. We want our children to steer clear of competition among themselves and instead establish the habit of cheering for each teammate. This is why the first line of our mission statement is, "We are a family of sincere listeners who champion each other."
I've been thinking of another line in our mission statement lately. "We choose to find the good in others and in ourselves, remembering always 'The worth of souls is great in the sight of God.'"
What does it mean to find the good? Does it seem like a simple task? Sometimes our vision gets cloudy and it is hard to see others with an eye of optimism and we fall into the destructive trap of nagging cynicism. Now, there are times, especially as parents where it is absolutely essential we give correction or where something may need to be said to a spouse. These things have to be done delicately and always in the spirit of love and prayer. I've had plenty of moments in my life where I've had to apologize immediately for my poor way of correcting.
I firmly believe though that we will ultimately find what we look for. If we look for faults in others, we will find them. If we look for strengths and beauty, we will find them. It is our choice! "We choose to find the good..."
President Gordon B. Hinckley has said, "My plea is that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. I am suggesting that as we go through life, we 'accentuate the positive.' I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generouly compliment and endorse virtue and effort."
Whenever I read this quote, I can't help but think of the story in John where Jesus heals the blind man. Perhaps it is because with my mortal limitations and my weaknesses, I don't always see the good. I become blinded by my pride, I become too focused on myself, or what I deserve. In these moments I pray, "Dear Father, please open my eyes, heal me of my blindness, help me to see what I am not seeing. Give me a new heart, a fresh vision outside of myself. Please give me eyes to see. Help me to focus on the good."
This Sunday in our church choir we are singing the old Irish hymn, "Be Thou My Vision". We will only be singing verses 1, 2, and 5. I wish we could find an arrangement for verses 3 & 4 too because I love all the words to this entire hymn.
This song is my prayer! It articulates the deepest desires of my heart.
"Be Thou My Vision"
1. Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.
As a mother, it is absolutely fascinating for me to watch my children move through different phases of their lives. In an effort to capture these moments and help my children hold them sacred, I write each of them a special letter at each stage. I do so to help them have a vision for who they are and the gifts they have been given. I call these letters their "Mother's Blessing".
The year my oldest turned eight, my husband and I discussed that we not only wanted a vision for each of our children at these stages but a vision for our family as a whole. We decided to write a mission statement of who we are and what it means to be a part of the Rawlins Team. We refer to our family as a team a lot to help our children understand the importance of unity. We want them to understand that we work with and for each other, not against or in isolation. We want our children to steer clear of competition among themselves and instead establish the habit of cheering for each teammate. This is why the first line of our mission statement is, "We are a family of sincere listeners who champion each other."
I've been thinking of another line in our mission statement lately. "We choose to find the good in others and in ourselves, remembering always 'The worth of souls is great in the sight of God.'"
What does it mean to find the good? Does it seem like a simple task? Sometimes our vision gets cloudy and it is hard to see others with an eye of optimism and we fall into the destructive trap of nagging cynicism. Now, there are times, especially as parents where it is absolutely essential we give correction or where something may need to be said to a spouse. These things have to be done delicately and always in the spirit of love and prayer. I've had plenty of moments in my life where I've had to apologize immediately for my poor way of correcting.
I firmly believe though that we will ultimately find what we look for. If we look for faults in others, we will find them. If we look for strengths and beauty, we will find them. It is our choice! "We choose to find the good..."
President Gordon B. Hinckley has said, "My plea is that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. I am suggesting that as we go through life, we 'accentuate the positive.' I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generouly compliment and endorse virtue and effort."
Whenever I read this quote, I can't help but think of the story in John where Jesus heals the blind man. Perhaps it is because with my mortal limitations and my weaknesses, I don't always see the good. I become blinded by my pride, I become too focused on myself, or what I deserve. In these moments I pray, "Dear Father, please open my eyes, heal me of my blindness, help me to see what I am not seeing. Give me a new heart, a fresh vision outside of myself. Please give me eyes to see. Help me to focus on the good."
This Sunday in our church choir we are singing the old Irish hymn, "Be Thou My Vision". We will only be singing verses 1, 2, and 5. I wish we could find an arrangement for verses 3 & 4 too because I love all the words to this entire hymn.
This song is my prayer! It articulates the deepest desires of my heart.
"Be Thou My Vision"
1. Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.
2. Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.
5. High King of Heaven, my victory won,
May I reach Heaven’s joys, O bright Heaven’s Sun!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all.
...............
3. Be Thou my battle Shield, Sword for the fight;
Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;
Thou my soul’s Shelter, Thou my high Tower:
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.
Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;
Thou my soul’s Shelter, Thou my high Tower:
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.
4. Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,
Thou mine Inheritance, now and always:
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,
High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art.
.............
-Alicia
