Light

We're studying the Book of Mormon as a ward family again this summer.  It's pretty awesome the way it works:  We all read the same pages together each day so we can be pondering the same verses. We share what we learn on our ward Facebook page and unify ourselves in heart and mind.  I loved doing this last year and am very excited to be doing it again!

I love the scriptures, especially the Book of Mormon.  I've read it over twenty something times and it never grows old to me.  The first time I read it was my Jr. year in high school.  (I keep thinking it was my Sr. year but it must have been my Jr. year because the friend of mine who challenged me to read was a grade above me and he was a Sr.) Anyway, it doesn't really matter when, the fact is - It was an amazing experience!

A couple of days ago, I was thinking about the power that comes into our lives when we sincerely study the scriptures and plant them deep within our hearts.  I thought back on where it began for me.

Before I ever read the Book of Mormon on my own, we had family scripture study on a somewhat regular basis.  It was more of a contentious time, a "shut-up-sit-down" environment if you know what I mean.  The spirit was difficult to feel.  My dad was so strict and incredibly controlling, smacking us if we didn't sit still.  It was very wrong the way he went about it.  I look back though and even amidst the memory of it being rigid, forceful, and frustrating, I'm glad my parents at least tried to read on those occasions.  They've definitely learned to loosen up since then and I'm proud of them for that.

One of the best decisions I ever made was to enroll in Seminary.  I took it from 9th grade until 12th.  My 9th grade seminary teacher constantly encouraged us to study the scriptures for ourselves.  I admit, the idea of reading the entire Book of Mormon from cover to cover seemed daunting to me at that age and, like I said, I never did read it that way until my Jr. year.  But my freshman seminary teacher was inspired and suggested I try a study-by-topic method.  "Pick a topic in the Topical Guide" he said "And go through all those verses with that word and study them."  I liked the method of study he suggested and decided to give it a try.

The topic I chose was "light."  I took my set of scriptures, searched the word light in the Topical Guide and combed through highlighting and studying all the scriptures I could find related to it.  It was a wonderful experience!  After that, I often bore testimony of this method, sharing with others my experience studying light and encouraging my friends to do the same with their own topic.

I think it's so fitting that light is what I chose because since then, the scriptures truly have been a "lamp unto my feet, a light unto my path." (Psalms 119:105)

Never any day have I needed to walk in darkness because I have had this light of truth to guide me.  I know that if ever there is confusion, a loss of direction, a sense of not really knowing where to go or what to do, we can receive direct, clear, and distinct answers through the power of prayer and deliberate, intentional, scripture study (both ancient and modern.)  I have witnessed it for myself time and time again.  It is a tested, tried, and proved method for revelation.  We can know of things to come and also be content with not knowing the timing or the details.  The Word is God, it is Light and Truth.  And when the Word is received and applied, it brings REST and peace of mind... no matter the test, no matter the circumstances.  This fixes my mind, heart, body, and soul on Truth.  This is faith in action!  This brings peace.

"Rest... is the mind at leisure from itself.  It is the perfect poise of the soul; the absolute adjustment of the inward man to the stress of all outward things; the preparedness against every emergency; the stability of assured convictions; the eternal calm of an invulnerable faith; the repose of a heart set deep in God.  It is the mood of the man who says, with Browning, 'God's in His Heaven, all's well with the world.'" - Henry Drummond

-Alicia

"Unarmed"

In my studies this morning, I read Mosiah 20:26 where it says, "And when the Lamanites saw the people of Limhi, that they were without arms [or unarmed], they had compassion on them and were pacified towards them." I thought of this scripture in the Bible "A soft answer turneth away wrath; but greivous words stir up anger."- Proverbs 15:1

I have to ask myself, "How am I doing with my communication in my family?"  What does it look and sound like to be the kind of person whose knee-jerk reaction is to speak "unarmed"?

As I ask myself this question, I think, "Well, there are just those 'certain people' who are more difficult to communicate with than others.  They are the ones who to me seem to always be 'armed' at everyone else, as if no matter what anyone says or does they are loaded with criticism, ready to shoot insults, scathing remarks, or personal jabs."  How the heck am I supposed to communicate with those people "unarmed"?  How do I "end the conflict" and end it now?  I can't make them lay down their "weapons of war" but I can surrender mine.  Oh man, but this kind of humility for me is SO much easier said than done.

I think of Elder Wirthlin's talk from a few years ago.  It's one of my favorites:

"Each one of us will travel a different road during this life. Each progresses at a different rate. Temptations that trouble your brother may not challenge you at all. Strengths that you possess may seem impossible to another. Never look down on those who are less perfect than you.

We are all children of our Heavenly Father. And we are here with the same purpose: to learn to love Him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and to love our neighbor as ourselves.

When we are filled with kindness, we are not judgmental. The Savior taught, "Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven."  He also taught that "with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again." 

"But," you ask, "what if people are rude?"

Love them.

"If they are obnoxious?"

Love them.

"But what if they offend? Surely I must do something then?"

Love them.

"Wayward?"

The answer is the same. Be kind. Love them.

Why? In the scriptures Jude taught, "And of some have compassion, making a difference." 

Who can tell what far-reaching impact we can have if we are only kind?

My brothers and sisters, the gospel of Jesus Christ transcends mortality. Our work here is but a shadow of greater and unimaginable things to come...

...As our Heavenly Father loves us, we also should love His children.

May we be models of kindness. May we ever live up to the words of the Savior: "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another." Of these truths I bear witness in the sacred name of Jesus Christ, amen." 

- By Joseph B. Wirthlin, given April 2005

 I have so much to learn.  I'm grateful for another day to practice this kind of communication, this type of love, this kindness.  One of these days I'll get it down to an art.... practice, practice, practice!  I'm so thankful for a loving and patient Father in Heaven who gives me new opportunities to learn to be and do a little better than the day before.

-Alicia

Pointing the Way

"Arrows"

by, Jimmy Needham

Just as Lehi and his family were guided through to the promised land,  I have no doubt that the Lord is guiding my life, every single step of the way as I continue to pray for direction and keep the faith!  :)

"Now, my son, I have somewhat to say concerning the thing which our fathers call a ball, or director—or our fathers called it Liahona, which is, being interpreted, a compass; and the Lord prepared it.

 And behold, there cannot any man work after the manner of so curious a workmanship. And behold, it was prepared to show unto our fathers the course which they should travel in the wilderness.

 And it did work for them according to their faith in God; therefore, if they had faith to believe that God could cause that those spindles should point the way they should go, behold, it was done; therefore they had this miracle, and also many other miracles wrought by the power of God, day by day." - Alma 37:38-40

Daily Determines Destiny

Like Nephi, "I do not know the meaning of all things" but I do know that God "loves His children" and that He has blessed us with the ability to commune with Him through constant prayer.  "The scriptures are laid before [us]" (Alma 30:44) and we have the words of living prophets to guide us. As we seek, we will find, I know this!  If we seek light and truth, the Lord will guide us to light and truth.  (D&C 88:40-41)

The key is to be spiritually minded:

 "Don’t let something you don’t fully understand unravel everything you do know. Be patient, cling to truth; understanding will come. Trials are like great mists of darkness that can blind our eyes and harden our hearts. Unless we are “continually holding fast” to the word of God and living it, we will become spiritually blinded rather than spiritually minded. Search the Book of Mormon and the words of the living prophets every day, every day, every day! It’s the key to spiritual survival and avoiding deception. Without it, we are spiritually lost." - Elder Kevin W. Pearson (April, 2015 General Conference -Stay By the Tree)

I don't know the meaning of all things.  But I do know that holding to, applying, seeking and studying the words of God must be part of "my every day" and if I do this, I will be guided right. I have been promised that never any day will I need to walk in darkness but will have the light of truth along my journey.  

That Light is available to anyone and everyone who seeks it:

"That was the true Light, which lighteth every man that cometh into the world." -John 1:19

Lead kindly light!  I pray for eyes to see, ears to hear, and a heart that understands the will of the Lord for me in my every day choices. - (Matthew 13:16)

"Our daily discipleship will determine our eternal destiny. Awaken unto God, cling to truth, keep your sacred temple covenants, and stay by the tree!" - Elder Kevin W. Pearson (April, 2015 General Conference -Stay By the Tree)

How grateful I am for a loving Father in Heaven who hears my constant prayers!  He knows my heart. 

-Alicia :)

Friendship,Faith, and Love

Sonya is tall and slender with dark blond hair past her shoulders.  She has the most beautiful blue eyes and a smile that couldn't be more perfect in the magazines.

Sonya and I met during my sophomore year in high school.  We had a drama class together.  That class was cake for her because she was the queen of performance!  You could put any piece of music in front of her and she could not only play it out beautifully with the piano, she also had an angelic voice with perfect pitch and tone to match.  She was naturally animated too, her expressions and mannerisms seemed to be as if she was always on stage.  Needless to say, she had the star role in every one of our high school performances; Steel Magnolias, Guys and Dolls, Bye Bye Birdie, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat, and The Curious Savage.

After high school graduation, I moved in with Sonya's family due to some difficulties going on in my own home.  Her parents, Catherine and Tom, took me in as one of their own, they were wonderful to me! Catherine was a piano teacher for many years, one of the very best.  I could see where Sonya got her musical gifts.  Her sister, Maren, was musical too, a gorgeous opera singer and ballet dancer, as feminine and finespun as a woman could be.  

I remember one day Sonya's dad, Tom, was helping me fix the fuel pump in my car.  I walked through the back door of the house with black and greasy fingers as I made my way over to the kitchen sink.  Maren eyed my hands in horror as she gasped, "How can you stand all of that filth on your fingers?"  

"I had fun," I said as I scrubbed, "Your dad is teaching me a lot."

"Oh, I could never do that!" She poised herself in a ballet-like form and sighed, "I... am a delicate flower."

I laughed out-loud!
I had never heard anyone refer to themselves as a "delicate flower" before and it caught me off guard.  How ridiculous it seemed. I guess I never really cared for nicely manicured hands, especially when it meant getting them dirty from learning something new.

"Oh Maren, you crack me up," I said "Of course you are.  And you never have to change." I patted her endearingly.  

Maren laughed her unique laugh that always made me smile. It almost sounded operatic, so fitting for her personality.

Aw, Maren.... she was awesome.

One afternoon Sonya rushed excitedly up the stairs  into our bedroom and showed me a quote she just discovered. (She knew I loved collecting them.)  

"Look at this one, Alicia.  You're gonna love it!"  She read to me from a little 3x5 card;

"There is no chance, no destiny, no fate, that can circumvent or hinder or control the firm resolve of a determined soul. - Ella Wheeler Wilcox

"Isn't that awesome!" she said. "Let's put it on the mirror in the bathroom and memorize it!"

"Okay!" I agreed wholeheartedly.

Our intention was to use it as our motto to pep us up as we prepared to go out and serve full-time missions.  There was no chance, no destiny, no fate that would stop us from going out into the white and ready field!!!  I met my husband the month before I turned 21 and married him 16 weeks later...so... I guess I wasn't all that "determined" to be a sister missionary. 

I grew to love everyone in Sonya's family.  I also learned that there is no such thing as a perfect home, no matter how ideal it looked on the outside.  Overall, the memories there will always be sweet to me. 

Sonya and I have kept in contact through the years.  She lives in Oregon now and whenever she comes home to visit she gives me a call or stops by my place.  She's much better at keeping touch than I am.  

One particular visit about seven years ago, she confided in me about some struggles she was having in her marriage.  

I referred her to some of my favorite Elder Holland talks and then said, "You know, we are always told to be more Christ-like, to do as He would do, to love like the Savior loved.  And truth be told, sometimes that is harder for me to grasp  I guess because I AM so far from perfect.  I don't know how to be like Him.  But I DO KNOW what it feels like TO LOVE HIM.  I mean, look at the scripture in Matthew for an example,"

"Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these... ye have done it unto me."- Matt 25:40

"Maybe Christ is telling us this  because He knew the concept of 'being like Him' would be hard for most of us to grasp? 

For me, it seems easier to know 'what to do' if we imagine everyone around us as if they were Him.

 What would we say?  How would we act?  

Christ's love changes us.  You see... because we are loved by someone so incredibly amazing, so unbelievable, how could it not change us?

Love is powerful!  Think about it... When you fall in love, you would do anything and everything for the very best interest of that person.  You would serve them and care for them willingly, most gratefully.  You would strive to be your very best self around them and would never want to harm or hurt them in any way.  

Now, what if you took that energy and treated everyone around you as if they were the 'one you loved'?  Can you imagine the impact?!!"

My friend and I talked back and forth about this concept, and she grew more and more excited to put it into practice. 

A year later, when she came to visit again she said, "You know, Alicia, that time you told me about loving everyone as if they are Christ instead of trying so hard to be like Christ was really freeing for me.  It just made more sense, so much easier to comprehend that way!  And it has been working." 

It was wonderful news to hear.

I've been thinking a lot about this concept. I resolve to put it into practice more:

How differently would I treat my spouse, my children, my neighbors, or the stranger on the street if with each of them, I imagined the Savior?  What if in every situation I "did unto others... as I would do unto Him"?  

What a force for good it could be!!

"We have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him.
Herein is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgment: because as he is, so are we in this world.
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear....
..We love him, because he first loved us." - 1 John 4:16-19

Because He Lives and Loves

My peace, my hope, my healer, and friend,

Author and finisher of my faith to the end,

Savior through Thee, I see heaven's view,

Truth breathes in life, my spirit made new,

The grace of Your love flows in my veins,

As my heart sings out, "My Savior Reigns!"

-Alicia Rawlins

Proving Faith, Patience, and Obedience

I discovered this clip from a talk by Elder Maxwell today.  These are some profound and beautiful thoughts:

....................................

"When we see things as they really were, really are, and really will be (see Jacob 4:13; D&C 93:24), dispensations are merely seasons, new friendships are but relationships resumed, and prophets sent forth on their errands from the Lord reflect associations which arc across the ages as they later rendezvous on mountaintops and hills, in woods, fields, groves, and even jails. (See Moses 1:1–2; Matt. 17:1–7; JS—H 1:14, 48–50; Acts 23:11.)

We are not now ready for all things the Lord has prepared in the City of God for them that love Him. (1 Cor. 2:9.) Our present eyes are unready for things which they have not yet seen, and our ears are not prepared for the transcending sounds and music of that city.

The trek will be proving and trying. Faith, patience, and obedience are essential (see Mosiah 23:21; Abr. 3:25), but he who completes the journey successfully will be immeasurably added upon. (see  Abr. 3:26.) And he who does not will have subtracted from the sum of his possibilities.
When we arrive home, we shall be weary and bruised. But at last our aching homesicknesses will cease. Meanwhile, our mortal homecomings are but faint foreshadowings of that Homecoming!
Brethren, these plain and precious doctrines restored in our time through the Prophet Joseph Smith are pulsating with perspective and are so light-intensive, like radioactive materials, that they must be handled with great care." - Neal A. Maxwell
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One other quote I came across this afternoon...

"Why are we drawn to certain persons, and they to us, as if we had always known each other:  Is it a fact that we always have?  Is there something, after all, in that much abused term ;affinity; and is this the basis of its claim?  At all events, it is just as logical to look back upon fond associations, as it is to look forward to them.  We believe that ties formed in this life will be continued in the life to come; then why not believe that... some of them at least, have been resumed in this state of existence?"

 - Orson F. Whitney

Revelation RX

An old African-American spiritual has two lines of irrefutable truth:

"There is a Balm in Gilead,

To make the wounded whole."

We had a lesson in church a couple of weeks ago on revelation.  We read the definition in the Bible dictionary and there were two words that seemed to jump out at me, "prescribed course".

"The principle of gaining knowledge by revelation is the principle of salvation. It is the making known of divine truth by communication with the heavens and consists not only of revelation of the plan of salvation to the Lord’s prophets but also a confirmation in the hearts of the believers that the revelation to the prophets is true. It also consists of individual guidance for every person who seeks for it and follows the prescribed course of faith, repentance, and obedience to the gospel of Jesus Christ. “The Holy Ghost is a revelator,” said Joseph Smith, and “no man can receive the Holy Ghost without receiving revelations” (HC 6:58). Without revelation, all would be guesswork, darkness, and confusion.

In the Lord’s Church the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve are prophets, seers, and revelators to the Church and to the world. In addition, every person may receive personal revelation for his own benefit. It is contrary to the laws of God for any person to receive revelation for those higher in authority (see D&C 28:2–8; 100:11; 107:91–92)." - Bible Dictionary "Revelation"

Just as a physician gives prescriptions in order for the patient to obtain certain results, our Father in heaven has given us a prescription, a rule or course of action to be followed, in order to receive personal revelation.

This is a liberating concept to me because in all my numerous weaknesses and shortcomings, the Lord still promises that I can commune with Him.  It's "prescription" not "perfection" that brings the results.

I believe the Lord desires to answer me in those things I have fasted prayed earnestly about.  He wants me to continue to seek for the meaning of those puzzle pieces in my life.  I sat there with my scriptures in my hand and read the words "prescribed course" over and over again.  I said a prayer in my heart, "Lord, as I have searched out these answers, I know I have followed the 'prescribed course' with all the sincerity of my heart! And in doing so, I was guided to specific scriptures and talks that applied perfectly and..." Before I could begin to ask all my questions again, the sweet assurance of the spirit almost interrupted me and said, "...and you received personal revelation. You can lay it down Alicia that you've received your answer."

I'm so thankful for the power of prayer, for scriptures, and for the comforting influence of the Spirit in my life. They are medicine to my soul! I do not need to know the end from the beginning.  I just need to follow the prescribed course one day at a time; love, serve, give, pray, study, apply, try, repent, forgive, and repeat.

 I trust my Physician.

Ere you left your room this morning,

Did you think to pray? …

When your soul was full of sorrow,

Balm of Gilead did you borrow

At the gates of day?

"And my soul hungered and I kneeled down before my Maker and I cried unto Him in mighty prayer and supplication for mine own soul; and all the day long did I cry unto Him; yea, and when the night came I did still raise my voice high that it reached the heavens."

"I cried unto Him continually, for He had said unto me: 'Whatsoever thing ye shall ask in faith, believing that yea shall receive in the name of Christ, ye shall receive it."  - (Enos 1:4,15)

-Alicia

More Than a Feeling

It was like I had my own little theme song playing for me as I walked on to BYU's campus for the first time as an official student:

"I woke up this morning and the sun was gone,
Turned on some music to start my day
I lost myself in a familiar song
I closed my eyes and I slipped away
It's more than a feeling, when I hear that old song they used to play (more than a feeling)
I begin dreaming (more than a feeling)"

 How often I have prayed for this opportunity and I'm living in it now!  No one around me realizes how long I've dreamed of this day.  To them, I'm just another student with headphones, walking to class with a cheesy grin on my face.  But for me I'm having a party inside as I'm living "the dream" and reminiscing this old Boston beat I used to play every day in college.

So much more than a feeling!  I felt like I was on cloud nine, and I still feel like It can't be happening.

I'm taking two classes, a religion one and anthropology.  I must say that anthropology is the perfect follow-up from having my experiences at the United Nations in March.  I desire greater understanding of my brothers and sisters around the world and in my own little circle.  It's amazing how we can understand ourselves so much more when we truly seek to understand others.  I have so much to learn, so very much.  In this class, I've already had to read almost 100 pages and trying to absorb everything has been a challenge to say the least.  I feel like that person trying to follow pop tart instructions and the vertical concept is thrown at them. "Uhhh uhh... poof!" My brain explodes!

This will be fun though, I'm excited to learn, to expand, and grow.  I can already see how this will be physically exhausting.  But one foot in front of the other and lots of prayers... I'm on my way.

"Don't Look Back"
by, Boston

Don't look back
A new day is breakin'
It's been too long since I felt this way
I don't mind where I get taken
The road is callin'
Today is the day

I can see
It took so long to realize
I'm much too strong
Not to comprimise
Now I see what I am is holding me down
I'll turn it around

I finally see the dawn arrivin'
I see beyond the road I'm drivin'
Far away and left behind

It's a new horizon and I'm awakin' now
Oh I see myself in a brand new way
The sun is shinin'
the clouds are breakin'
'Canse I can't lose now, there's no game to play

I can tell
There's no more time left to criticize
I've seen what I could not recognize
Everthing in my life was leading me on
but I can be strong

I finally see the dawn arrivin'
I see beyond the road I'm drivin'
Far away and left behind

-Alicia

By the Spirit of Revelation

(This talk never grows old to me.    Sometimes I doubt that which I felt was revelation... not because I doubt God.... but because I doubt myself.  I am aware of my weaknesses and it's easy to feel after receiving a very clear answer through fasting and prayer that it was all in my head.  I truly need this encouragement as I continue to seek revelation in my life.  These are the parts of Elder Holland's talk that encouraged me most today.)

.............

"I... believe that the adversary and his pinched, calculating little minions try to oppose [our revelation] experiences and then try to darken them after they happen. But that is not the way of the gospel. That is not the way of a Latter-day Saint who claims as the fundamental fact of the Restoration the spirit of revelation. Fighting through darkness and despair and pleading for the light is what opened this dispensation. It is what keeps it going, and it is what will keep you going. With Paul, I say to all of you:

“Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward.  For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise.” 

"With any major decision there are cautions and considerations to make, but once there has been illumination, beware the temptation to retreat from a good thing. If it was right when you prayed about it and trusted it and lived for it, it is right now."

"Like Moses in that vision, there may come after the fact some competing doubts and confusion, but it will pale when you measure it against the real thing. Remember the real thing. Remember how urgently you have needed help in earlier times and you got it. The Red Sea will open to the honest seeker of revelation."

"Oliver Cowdery, who missed the opportunity of a lifetime because he didn’t seize it in the lifetime of the opportunity, the Lord said, “You did not continue as you commenced.” Does that sound familiar to those who have been illuminated and then knuckled under to second thoughts and returning doubts?"

"After you have gotten the message, after you have paid the price to feel His love and hear the word of the Lord, go forward."

"If God has told you something is right, if something is indeed true for you, He will provide the way for you to accomplish it."

-Jeffrey R. Holland

Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence

Spiritual Awareness

I just finished reading the story of Alma and his bretheren. As I reflect back on these chapters I think of  Alma 17:2-3. I love the description of what united these friends in the Lord so deeply, "they had waxed strong in the knowledge of the truth; for they were men of a sound understanding and they had searched the scriptures diligently, that they might know the word of God.  But this is not all; they had given themselves to much prayer, and fasting; therefore they had the spirit of prophecy, and the spirit of revelation, and when they taught, they taught with power and authority of God."

1. They came to know truth and also understood it.  This implies they received it with both mind and heart.

2. They searched the scriptures diligently.  This includes the scripture that we call the "words of the living prophets".  D&C 68:4

3. They gave themselves to much fasting and much prayer.  Sincere prayer and fasting causes one to wax stronger and stronger in their humility and firmer and firmer in the faith of Christ  - Heleman 3:35

I believe these three steps were so interwoven into the hearts of these young men that they didn't have to remind themselves to do any of them.  Doing such was not a duty but a privilege, it was their sincere desire and they delighted in it!  Such habits and attitudes among them created a strong "spiritual awareness."  Regularly applying these things enabled them to have the spirit of revelation, to perceive and foresee that which is unseen by the natural man. And when they taught, it was more than words because "they taught with power and authority of God."

In the various roles I play in life, mother, sister, wife, friend, teacher, student, etc. many things clamor for my time and attention.  It can be difficult to find balance or to know exactly where best to spend my energy.  I tell my children that my love is never divided among them, only multiplied.  But because we live in a sphere governed by minutes and hours, my time is divided among them.... So I pray for wisdom in how I use it.

I don't always know from day to day how I'm going to accomplish everything that requires my time and attention.  I just know that if I stick to these three basic things that Alma and his friends did, the Spirit will give me an awareness of that which matters most.  And usually those things which matters most are NOT the things that obtrusively ring in my ear.  Rather it is the quiet whisper that says, "Stop what you are doing for five minutes Alicia and just attentively listen to your child."  It's that nudge that says, "Walk to your next appointment instead of drive this time."  Or maybe the Spirit says "put down all your dinner preparations and greet your husband when he arrives home from work, just hug him for three or four uninterrupted minutes."

I really think in today's complicated world we underestimate "the small and simple things."  I don't know if it's balance we need so much of, as if God expects us to juggle everything thrown at us like circus performers.  I believe it's wisdom we need more of, more spiritual awareness to guide us to those things that matter most.  Ezra Taft Benson taught this wonderful truth, “When we put God first, all other things fall into their proper place or drop out of our lives. Our love of the Lord will govern the claims for our affection, the demands on our time, the interests we pursue, and the order of our priorities.”

"Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved." - Thomas S. Monson

- Alicia

"Let them be for signs, and for seasons"

"And I, God, said: Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven, to divide the day from the night, and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and for years" - Moses 2:14

If we are "not watching" we may begin to deny the existence of God.  We may begin to doubt in His power, promises, and His love.
"And if that servant is not found watching, he will say in his heart, My Lord delayeth his coming" JST Luke 12:54

It is interesting that in these last days, during these "signs and seasons" the night sky is often veiled to us and it seems as if the "lights in the heavens" have gone out.  But on the other hand, we also live in a time where with the right tools we can actually see the stars better than any other people who have lived on the earth ever could.

Several weeks ago, we had the opportunity to pull out my husband's telescope with some friends of ours.  We could see Venus, Mars, and the cloud bands on Jupiter as well as its moons.  We saw The Orion Nebula and The Seven Sisters.  We could also see the craters of our own moon with enough clarity that you could see the shadows they cast and their depth.  It was AMAZING!

I love that we have this "parable in the sky".
We might ask ourselves? "What are two main things that prevent us from seeing the stars on a dark clear night?"  I propose that they are the same things that prevent us from seeing the "signs and seasons" the "glory of God" in these last days.

Pollution and Man-made Lights

1. Pollution- "Yea, it shall come in a day when there shall be great pollutions upon the face of the earth; there shall be murders, and robbing, and lying, and deceivings, and whoredoms, and all manner of abominations; when there shall be many who will say, Do this, or do that, and it mattereth not, for the Lord will uphold such at the last day. But wo unto such, for they are in the gall of bitterness and in the bonds of iniquity." - Mormon 8:31

2. Man-made lights-  "He commandeth that there shall be no priestcrafts; for, behold, priestcrafts are that men preach and set themselves up for a light unto the world, that they may get gain and praise of the world; but they seek not the welfare of Zion. - 2 Nephi 26:29

If these two things prevent us from seeing the stars, the signs in the heavens, and the glory of God, is it possible that these two things might also prevent us from seeing the worth and beauty in others?  How do we have the "eyes to see" what are the "tools" we are given?

Tools to See the "Stars" Clearly

Tool #1 The Spirit - "The spirit sees things as they really are and as they really will be." - Jacob 4:13   If it is by the Spirit that we come to know God, shouldn't that be the same means by which we come to know one another?  I believe that when we earnestly seek the Spirit we will find God everywhere!

Tool #2 The Word of God - In Lehi's vision of the Tree of Life, it was the word of God "the iron rod" that led them to the fruit.  It guides individuals through the darkness, the confusion and lies.
-1 Nephi 15:23-24

Tool #3 Prayer and Fasting - This is the door to heaven.  "I wonder if we can ever really fathom the immense power of prayer until we encounter an overpowering, urgent problem and realize that we are powerless to resolve it. Then we will turn to our Father in humble recognition of our total dependence on Him. It helps to find a secluded place where our feelings can be vocally expressed as long and as intensely as necessary." - Richard G. Scott  
Fasting helps us have a vision outside ourselves, we offer up a sacrifice to show how much we care and what we are willing to suffer on another's behalf.  I believe that a person who cherishes and keeps the law of the fast, understands more fully the love of our Savior. 

Tool #4 Covenants - If prayer and fasting are the doorway to heaven then I believe that making and keeping sacred covenants are what holds that door open.  When we are serious about our covenants, when we honor them in word and deed, it is a demonstration of our love, testimony, and devotion to God and our fellow man. And because covenants go two ways, we can rest assure that the promises from our Father in Heaven are solid.  They give us hope and reason to press on, "they produce the faith necessary to persevere and to do all things that are expedient in the Lord. Our willingness to take upon us the name of Christ and keep His commandments requires a degree of faith, but as we honor our covenants, that faith expands. In the first place, the promised fruits of obedience become evident, which confirms our faith. Secondly, the Spirit communicates God’s pleasure, and we feel secure in His continued blessing and help. Thirdly, come what may, we can face life with hope and equanimity, knowing that we will succeed in the end because we have God’s promise to us individually, by name, and we know He cannot lie" - D. Todd Christofferson (see Enos 1:6; Ether 3:12).

"The Lord Shall Guide Thee"

I believe God wants to reveal Himself to us, He wants the veil to be lifted and our eyes to be opened, to see the glory of His kingdom, the signs and wonders that sing out His name.  Prove Him through prayer, fasting, scriptures, and covenants and He will "open the windows of heaven" and the "stars will shine brighter than ever before", His spirit will be so abundant in your life that you'll be overwhelmed with "not room enough to receive it".

"In every part and portion of the revelations of God as given to the children of men, or to any individual in heaven or on earth, to understand them properly, a man needs the Spirit by which they were given—the Spirit that reveals such matters to the understanding, and makes them familiar to the mind.. ...we should all live so that the Spirit of revelation could dictate and write on the heart and tell us what we should do" - Brigham Young

-Alicia

2015 - 20th Anniversary

This is the year we celebrate the 20th anniversary of The Proclamation to the World about the family.  Interestingly, it is also the year that the UN celebrates the 20th anniversary of the Beijing Platform.

The first document to the world describes our Divine identity as women, and the beautiful role we play in our families. The second document sees motherhood in a negative light and seeks to dismantle our role in the family.

"In the preliminary document for the Beijing +5 Conference in 2000, one of the stated obstacles to human rights (translation: abortion on demand and same-sex marriage) was the "...persistence of traditional and stereotypical attitudes."
   In the section on Woman and the Media, there was language stating opposition to the 'negative images of women; and stereotyped portrayals;' (translation: mothers).  The women at this conference were urged to target journalists and media specialists, media associations, educational and training institutions to promote balanced and non-stereotyped portrayals of women." - Susan Roylance (Mothers & Fathers Defending Marriage and Family in the Halls of the U.N.)

Simply stated in "UN Beijing platform language" - "motherhood" and "traditional family" are bad words and damaging stereotypes and must be done away.

"In the gathering storm over defending marriage, the weather-vane pointing to our future is oscillating wildly.  Our destiny as a society will depend on whether we can protect our most fundamental social institution: marriage and the family.  As citizens of a democratic republic, we need not be at the mercy of judicial winds.  We can control our destiny!" - Richard G. Wilkins (Author of 'A Sacred Duty')

So how do we defend our most fundamental institution? The answer is simple.  We start in our own homes.  We seek to do all we can to strengthen our marriage and our relationships with our children, to build our home on a foundation of faith and trust in God. We embrace the complimentary unique and different roles of husband and wife. We always work with and for each other and never against. We strive to practice patience, kind words that build and uplift, habits that nurture and invite the Spirit.  We must be vigilant in safeguarding and monitoring closely the amount and content of media diet being fed to our minds and our family.  Wise mothers and fathers do not allow the rivers of filthy water to flow through the airwaves of their home.  They constantly ask themselves, "what is being taught" and "how is it being received".  Wise mothers and fathers seek the Spirit of the Lord in all they do through constant daily prayer and scripture study.

The Prophet Joseph Smith appeared to Brigham Young in a vision and said, "Tell the people to be humble and faithful and sure to keep the Spirit of the Lord and it will lead them right. Be careful and not turn away the small still voice; it will teach [you what] to do and where to go; it will yield the fruits of the kingdom. Tell the brethren [and sisters] to keep their hearts open to conviction so that when the Holy Ghost comes to them, their hearts will be ready to receive it. They can tell the Spirit of the Lord from all other spirits. It will whisper peace and joy to their souls, and it will take malice, hatred, envying, strife, and all evil from their hearts; and their whole desire will be to do good, bring forth righteousness, and build up the kingdom of God. Tell the brethren [and sisters] if they will follow the Spirit of the Lord they will go right."

Malachi teaches about turning our hearts to our fathers and the most important Father we should turn to is our Heavenly One.  We are His children and His heart has been turned to us from the very beginning.  He loves us with an immeasurable and powerful love!  "We love Him because He first loved us." As we rightfully make Him first in our lives, everything else will fall into its proper place.  I know this. I trust this with my whole soul!

The Family Proclamation declares this irrefutable truth, "Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities."

The solutions of the world are not found in the works of the flesh, in the intellects, the philosophers, and talking heads. Show me a person who has innumerable followers, popularity, high accolades, degrees and doctorates, scholarly knowledge, who has read all the books and passed all the tests but who has never learned to care for their family, never learned to recognize and act upon the Spirit, never learned to reach beyond their obsession of self to sincerely love their neighbor, who has never learned to truly love and truly serve - and you've shown me a fool, indeed.

The Kingdom of God will crush the Kingdoms of the earth in a way that those who only see by the flesh won't be able to understand because they will not open their eyes.  The stone cut out of the mountain without hands means "without the flesh"... it will be by the power of the Spirit!  Those who have eyes to see, ears to hear, and hearts that understand will not faint but with hope will listen to "the distant triumph song."

-Alicia

A Sense of the Sacred

Stepping off the subway onto the platform, we perceived that we were close.  Even though our travels left us with little to no sleep we intuitively knew that this had to be the very first part of our eight-day trip.

"Take the stairs on your right," were the instructions I recalled as I relayed them to the sisters at my side.  I kept my eyes toward the Manhattan sky as we neared the top steps that led to 66th street.  I wanted him to be the very first thing I saw... Sure enough, there he was, the Angel Moroni! What a beautiful sight!

Tears welled up in my eyes, I wished that I could stop the bustling crowds on the street, somehow halt them in their helter-skelter, take each person by the shoulders, and emphatically declare, "Do you know what this place is? Do you know what it has to offer your life? This is home! This is what I treasure and where I feel treasured, it sustains me, it gives me hope and purpose! It means the world to me, oh how I love the Temple!"

The next couple of hours were spent in reverence within the walls of our "home away from home" as we performed sacred ordinances there, prayed there, and read pages from the scriptures there.  The Spirit of the Lord was strong confirming our purpose for coming to New York and witnessing that His hand is in all of this.

The following day we had the opportunity to return for Sunday services.  They happened to be having Stake Conference and  Elder Holstrum and Elder Smith of the 70 were the main speakers. They were both inspired in their words and again we felt confirming witnesses in our purpose.

 Elder Smith spoke of feeling inadequate when he was called to the 70 and testified of the Lord's ability to qualify those whom He calls.

Elder Halstrom spoke of reverence and defined it as a deep and abiding respect and love for God, a respect and love so deep and so profound that it changes us, influences everything we do and every choice we make, everywhere we go.  He quoted the following from Elder D. Todd Christofferson:

"The importance of having a sense of the sacred is simply this—if one does not appreciate holy things, he will lose them. Absent a feeling of reverence, he will grow increasingly casual in attitude and lax in conduct. He will drift from the moorings that his covenants with God could provide. His feeling of accountability to God will diminish and then be forgotten. Thereafter, he will care only about his own comfort and satisfying his uncontrolled appetites. Finally, he will come to despise sacred things, even God, and then he will despise himself.

On the other hand, with a sense of the sacred, one grows in understanding and truth. The Holy Spirit becomes his frequent and then constant companion. More and more he will stand in holy places and be entrusted with holy things. Just the opposite of cynicism and despair, his end is eternal life." - D. Todd Christofferson (BYU Speeches 2004 A Sense of the Sacred)

As he quoted these words, I couldn't help but think of the things I held as sacred in my life; the Temple, marriage, family, motherhood, inspiring friends, scripture study, personal prayer, and the freedoms fought for me to have all these things.

I admit, these first two days here have been overwhelmingly busy, consuming every minute of the day, we get less than 5 hours of sleep each night.  But the Spirit we have felt among each other and in the preparations we have made have also been overwhelming and consuming.  What a feast it has been and what a perfect way to start out our mission!

-Alicia

Revelation - "Lifting of the Veil"

 The root of the Greek word apokalupsis, translated ‘revelation,’ is kalu, meaning ‘a veil or covering.’  The prefix apo is a preposition meaning ‘from, away from.’  The suffix -psis denotes action or process.  Apokalupsis therefore means the action or process of taking away the veil.

Revelation = "Lifting of the Veil"  What a thought provoking concept!

I have spent much focus in my studies on the doctrine of revelation these last couple of weeks.  I desire more than anything to be guided by the Spirit in my life... but because I am mortal I have weaknesses, and I can be a little slow in recognizing exactly what the Lord is trying to reveal to me.

Have you ever prayed about something and received an answer but over the course of a few days looked back in disbelief and said to yourself, "It can't be true, it was just my own thoughts"?  It's in moments like these that I feel the desire to pray, fast, study God's word, and seek the Spirit even more diligently as Alma did.  He recognized inspiration from the Lord from following this pattern to such an extent that he knew it!  He boldly testified, "They are made known unto me by the Holy Spirit of God.  Behold I have fasted and prayed many days that I might know these things of myself.  And now I do know of myself that they are true; for the Lord God hath made them manifest unto me by his Holy Spirit; and this is the spirit of revelation which is in me." - Alma 5:46

I have seen this pattern of "prayer, fasting, study of God's word, and seeking the Spirit" work in my own life and can testify of its validity.  When it is of the Lord, I have also noticed that I will receive multiple witnesses confirming its truth from several different sources; a conference talk, a sermon in sacrament meeting, verses I come across in my scripture study, and of course the peaceful calm of the Spirit.

Just recently, I have "given [myself] to much fasting and prayer" about a direction in my life I feel the Lord is taking me but seeking to know most sincerely if it is truly the Lord reveling it to me or if it's my own desires. I have read scriptures that have given me the answer before but I am slow sometimes and need a 3rd or 4th witness.   I asked Him to forgive me for asking one more time and prayed that He would show me one more scripture to confirm that this was truly a revelation from Him.  I opened my Bible, thumbed through the pages and the first verse my eyes fell on were these, "For it is not ye that speak, but the Spirit of your Father which speaketh in you."  - Matthew 10:20
I just don't see things like that as a coincidence.  This was a direct answer to me.

The Lord wants to reveal things to us!  Look at the intense faith the brother of Jared had.  It was so great that "he could not be kept from beholding within the veil" and "he saw Jesus" - Ether 3:18,19
I believe that if we could truly see how powerful faith is, it would almost frighten us. "It is by faith that miracles are wrought; and it is by faith that angels appear and minister" - Moroni 7:37

 "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us." - Marianne Williamson

We are literal children of God, children of the Light. "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience." -Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
I love that we have direct access to our Heavenly Home through prayer, through Jesus Christ, and that with full faith we can see what the Lord desires to show us.

I am so thankful to know emphatically that I have a loving Father in Heaven who not only hears my prayers but is involved in the smallest details of my life.  He wants to "lift the veil" from our eyes, He wants us to see His face and recognize His benevolent and guiding hand.

-Alicia

Our First Language

In the Bible Dictionary under "God" it states that God can only be known by revelation. What is revelation?  Simply stated, it is communication with our Father in Heaven through the Holy Ghost.

How we are able to converse with God fascinates me, this concept that we can communicate in a spiritual way with One who we do not physically see or hear is magnificent!  He even knows our hearts without us saying a single word. We can feel His influence beyond the boundaries of space and time, enlightening our minds and speaking peace to our souls. This "spiritual language" makes sense to me though because as His sons and daughters, it truly is our first language, the language of angels. (see 2 Nephi 32:3)

So, here's my question...

If we can draw closer to and come to know our Father in Heaven through the means of this "higher communication", through the power of the Holy Ghost,  is it possible we can come to know our brothers and sisters here on earth the same way?  I believe that it is not only possible but Divinely expected for us to do so.

This brings new meaning to the scripture that God "created all things... spiritually" before he created them naturally. (Moses 3:5)

Just some thoughts I've been having...

-Alicia

"As you appropriately seek for and apply unto the spirit of revelation, I promise you will “walk in the light of the Lord” (Isaiah 2:5; 2 Nephi 12:5). Sometimes the spirit of revelation will operate immediately and intensely, other times subtly and gradually, and often so delicately you may not even consciously recognize it. But regardless of the pattern whereby this blessing is received, the light it provides will illuminate and enlarge your soul, enlighten your understanding (see Alma 5:7; 32:28), and direct and protect you and your family." - Elder David A. Bednar

"Rejoice Evermore"

I love experiences where you pour your whole soul and heart out in prayer and then go to the scriptures and find words that speak directly to you.  Yesterday in family scripture study, both my husband and I took a few minutes to bear testimony of this principle.

I treasure my sacred moments with the Lord, where I can pray out loud and hold nothing back from Him.  He hears me and He knows everything in my heart.

I'm almost finished with "Increase in Learning" the first book of a three part series by, David A. Bednar.  If there is one thing I desire more to learn than anything else, it is to have a greater measure of the Spirit in my life.  I want eyes to see clearly and to be able to discern between truth and error every minute of every day.  It's easy for me to pray about but harder to apply.  I am thankful that I have a merciful Heavenly Father who is patient with me in my weakness.

After some pretty soulful prayers yesterday, I opened my book by Elder Bednar and saw he had listed several scriptures in the context of his writing.  I took a few minutes to look up each scripture and through that process came across some that I truly needed to hear!

"Fear not [Alicia], let your heart be comforted; yea, rejoice evermore, and in everything give thanks;  Waiting patiently on the Lord, for your prayers have entered into the ears of the Lord of Sabaoth, and are recorded with this seal and testament - the Lord hath sworn and decreed that they shall be granted.  Therefore, He giveth this promise unto you, with an immutable covenant that they shall be fulfilled; and all things wherewith you have been afflicted [or will be afflicted] shall work together for your good, and to my name's glory, saith the Lord"  - D&C 98:1-3

Then in cross-reference, I read these scriptures:

"Blessed be the Lord, because He hath heard the voice of my supplications.  The Lord is my strength and my shield: my heart trusted in Him, and I am helped: therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; and with my song will I praise Him." - Psalms 28:6-7

"Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait I say on the Lord." - Psalms 27:14

I resolve today to rejoice and give thanks in all things. I truly have SO MUCH to be thankful for.  What a wonderful, wonderful life I have right here and NOW.  I am so richly blessed!   I know my prayers are heard.  I trust that "[My] God doth undertake to guide [my] future as he has [my] past. [My] hope, [my] confidence let nothing shake; all now mysterious shall be bright at last." - Be Still My Soul 

I want to focus on the present moments and not let the little opportunities I have with my husband and my children to pass me by.  And with each moment I'm given here and now, I want to make the kinds of choices that better prepare me for what lies ahead, even though I can't see what that means for me.  Ultimately, I am preparing to meet my Savior when He returns to earth or when I leave this life - I want to be ready, I want to live by the Spirit and have my lamp full and trimmed, adorned for Him by the choices I've made and all I've treasured in my heart upon this journey.

-Alicia

"Everything we hope to accomplish in the future, how we prepare for the responsibilities that will ultimately be ours, is really a function of what we do today. Though some things about the future will always seem uncertain, the future is not entirely a mystery. To a great extent the future is shaped by the accumulation of all our daily activities and disciplined efforts." - Craig C. Christensen
"Tomorrow is Today"

Feels Like Home

You know that feeling you get when you walk into a loved-one's home where family is gathered for dinner, that feeling when you are greeted with warm embraces, well-known faces, and the aroma of freshly baked rolls?  Well, it was that kind of feeling I had experienced...  and it's funny because the place I entered into at that moment was one I had never set foot in before.  I didn't even know the tenants and had just barely met the landlord who was giving me and my husband "the tour."  The apartment was cluttered with boxes and junk everywhere, nothing was cooking and I'm quite certain the actual smell of the place was not a flavorful aroma.  Yet as sure as anything, when I walked through that door, I had a very clear and distinct experience.

After our tour of the place, my husband and I walked back to our little red Nissan. He pulled out a paper and scribbled down some notes as I sat in silence and tried to make sense of what just happened.
Then turning to my husband, I asked in a perplexed tone, "Did you feel that!??"
"Feel what?" He asked
"That was really strange." I said staring back at the apartment building.
"What was really strange?" He prodded.
"When we walked through that apartment, I felt like I was entering a family member's home.  The atmosphere, everything about the place... I could practically smell freshly baked rolls too.  And yet, there was none of that.  Joseph, it was so crazy!   I felt it so strong.  It was a feeling like 'coming home!'"

A few weeks passed and it turned out that small apartment did end up being our home.  It's probably a good thing I had such a strong feeling when we toured our little place because I was not impressed with the fact that there were no washer or dryer hookups and there wasn't much of a yard for the kids to play in either.  (Besides, we had another option of a place we liked a little better just about three blocks south if only we could make the follow-up contact with that landlord.)  But here we are and we have lived in this place almost four times as long as we have lived anywhere else.

Now in retrospect, I can't help but think of the numerous occasions I came to Provo before my husband ever even started school here.

Come to think of it, this is actually where I lived for the very first month of my life.  There was no room for me at the Newborn Intensive Care Unit in SLC so they flew me here.   My mom would drive two hours round-trip every day to UV Hospital in order to nurse me for those first several weeks.  This was my first home.

Provo was a place my husband visited often his whole life.  Ever since he was a little boy, his family has had the tradition of coming down to Provo for two things; Memorial Day and the Freedom Festival.  We married in the fall of 1999 so the very next year was my first time joining him in those two family traditions.  Since 2000 I have been coming to these events here every single year.

Every Memorial Day we'd visit the cemetery, get pictures taken with his family and have a lovely little picnic at one of Provo's parks.  For the Freedom Festival, we always came to watch the big parade and camped out several times in front of the Library on University Avenue. My personal favorite was running over to the baseball field to see the hot air balloons launch at sunrise.

Year after year we came to Provo.  Little did I know then that I would move here.  Little did I know how I would completely fall in love with this place or that here my dreams would come true.  But I know now, without any doubt that the Lord has been guiding me all along.  It's exciting to think about because He continues to guide me.  It's true... I don't know what my future holds but I know Who holds my future.  I trust Him.

I look ahead prospectively at BYU and am so happy to say now that I will be staying for a very long time. This is where I'm meant to be. This is truly home to me.

-Alicia

Be Thou My Vision

I believe there are pivotal stages and transitional ages, as we grow into maturity: Birth (0), the age of accountability (8), the age of adolescence (12), and the transition into adulthood (18).

As a mother, it is absolutely fascinating for me to watch my children move through different phases of their lives.  In an effort to capture these moments and help my children hold them sacred, I write each of them a special letter at each stage.  I do so to help them have a vision for who they are and the gifts they have been given.  I call these letters their "Mother's Blessing".

The year my oldest turned eight, my husband and I discussed that we not only wanted a vision for each of our children at these stages but a vision for our family as a whole.  We decided to write a mission statement of who we are and what it means to be a part of the Rawlins Team.  We refer to our family as a team a lot to help our children understand the importance of unity. We want them to understand that we work with and for each other, not against or in isolation.  We want our children to steer clear of competition among themselves and instead establish the habit of cheering for each teammate.  This is why the first line of our mission statement is, "We are a family of sincere listeners who champion each other."

I've been thinking of another line in our mission statement lately. "We choose to find the good in others and in ourselves, remembering always 'The worth of souls is great in the sight of God.'"

What does it mean to find the good?  Does it seem like a simple task?  Sometimes our vision gets cloudy and it is hard to see others with an eye of optimism and we fall into the destructive trap of nagging cynicism.  Now, there are times, especially as parents where it is absolutely essential we give correction or where something may need to be said to a spouse.  These things have to be done delicately and always in the spirit of love and prayer.  I've had plenty of moments in my life where I've had to apologize immediately for my poor way of correcting.

I firmly believe though that we will ultimately find what we look for.  If we look for faults in others, we will find them.  If we look for strengths and beauty, we will find them.  It is our choice!  "We choose to find the good..."

President Gordon B. Hinckley has said, "My plea is that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight.  I am suggesting that as we go through life, we 'accentuate the positive.' I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generouly compliment and endorse virtue and effort."

Whenever I read this quote, I can't help but think of the story in John where Jesus heals the blind man.  Perhaps it is because with my mortal limitations and my weaknesses, I don't always see the good.  I become blinded by my pride, I become too focused on myself, or what I deserve.  In these moments I pray, "Dear Father, please open my eyes, heal me of my blindness, help me to see what I am not seeing.  Give me a new heart, a fresh vision outside of myself.  Please give me eyes to see.  Help me to focus on the good."

This Sunday in our church choir we are singing the old Irish hymn, "Be Thou My Vision".  We will only be singing verses 1, 2, and 5.  I wish we could find an arrangement for verses 3 & 4 too because I love all the words to this entire hymn.


This song is my prayer!  It articulates the deepest desires of my heart.

"Be Thou My Vision"

1.  Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

2.  Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.

5.  High King of Heaven, my victory won,
May I reach Heaven’s joys, O bright Heaven’s Sun!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all.

...............

3.  Be Thou my battle Shield, Sword for the fight;
Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;
Thou my soul’s Shelter, Thou my high Tower:
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.

4.  Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,
Thou mine Inheritance, now and always:
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,
High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art.

.............

-Alicia