The Art of Losing Self

The Lord calls out... “Give me all of you!!! I don’t want so much of your time, so much of your talents and money, and so much of your work. I want you!!! All of you!! I have not come to torment or frustrate the natural man or woman, but to kill it! No half measures will do. I don’t want to only prune a branch here and a branch there; rather I want the whole tree out! Hand it over to me, the whole outfit, all of your desires, all of your wants and wishes and dreams. Turn them all over to me, give yourself to me and I will make of you a new self---in my image. Give me yourself and in exchange I will give you Myself. My will, shall become your will. My heart, shall become your heart.” - C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

As I “Give up [my]self... [I]will find [my] real self. Lose [my] life... [I] will save it. Submit to death, death of [my]ambitions and favorite wishes every day and death of [my]whole body and in the end submit with ever fiber of [my]being... [I]will find eternal life. [As I] Keep back nothing. Nothing that [I]have not given away will be really [mine]. Nothing in [me]that has not died will ever be raised from the dead...  [As I] look for Christ and [I]will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in.”  
― C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

-Alicia

Count On Me

A few times a year, I drive 45 min. north to pick up my 17 yr old niece from her dad's house to stay with us a few nights.  My kids begin jumping out of the doors of the car before I can even put it in park as they see Alexa coming down the apartment stairs.  They love it when she stays with us.  She's like a big sister to them.

Ever since she was three and her parents divorced, Alexa has spent many weekends with us. I've watched her as she's been dragged through so many relationships.  It's been difficult as her mother has moved from one boyfriend to the next (and one girlfriend when my sister tried an alternative lifestyle).  Both of Alexa's parents are very opposed to the teachings of the Church and openly express their reasoning why.  She has been raised with a steady diet of skepticism and anti-religion/anti-God sentiments.  I guess you could could say she's been planted in a "poor spot of ground." (Jacob 5:21-22)  But despite this fact and despite all odds, she has kept her senses about her and has searched for truth.  She has a firm belief in God and an innate desire to follow Him.  She has proven strong and spiritually aware through all these years.  I'm so thankful for the example she has been to my children of resilience, cheerfulness, and meek-like confidence.  I have grown so close to her, she has won my heart, and is definitely a part of me. I like to call her my "fifth child." I couldn't be more proud of who she has become.

Last summer, I had the opportunity to take Alexa with me to Texas to visit my younger brother.  One of the days we were there, we strolled through a gift shop.  In the corner of the room stood one of those metal spinning displays...  You know the ones with fridge magnets of boys and girls names attached to their meaning below?  I looked for each name in our little family and searched for Alexa's too.
I discovered Alexa is short for Alexandra and means "Helper of Man".  Excitedly I waved the little card at her and said, "Hey, did you know your name meant this?"
"No" she responded as she read the description in her hand.  "That's really cool!"
"Yeah it is! Because that's totally who you ARE!"
My brother interrupted, "You know, Alicia, I'm the one who named her?"
I smiled, "You did?"
"Yeah, when she was born, I told them they should name her Alexa and they did."
"How cool is that?! You chose well, Kenneth, because this fits her perfectly!"
He agreed.

Alexa stayed few nights with us this past April.  It was the usual routine of picking her up from her dad's and my kids leaping out of the car in excitement to see her.  She dished out multiple hugs and kisses and then hopped into the front seat next to me.  We hit the road back to my house and played for each other our latest and most current favorite song.
I'm not sure how legal it is to be behind the wheel breaking out in full dance moves while cruising 75 mph down the interstate but... well...  we were having fun.  ;)
Laughing at one another's expressions and singing at the top our lungs, we savored the moment!
Alexa scrolled through her playlist as she hooked up her cell phone to my stereo, "check this one out" she said.
I loved it instantly and it became a new favorite of mine.
I think I have a thousand favorites. ;)

-Alicia

Holding On!

One of my favorite stories in the scriptures is when Jesus calls Peter out onto the water.  Matthew 14:25-33 

With that... I think "In the strength of the Lord" makes a great talk to follow-up those verses.

....Of course, if I throw in a perfect talk, I've got to throw in a perfect song to go along side it too.  ;)

Holding On to You

A Perfect Start

Ever have one of those mornings that propels the rest of your day into a blissful spin?

I woke up super early, said my prayers, studied my scriptures, and then sprinted out the door to go jogging with my wonderful friend, Heidi.  I love running with her.  We always find something to share with each other that leaves us both feeling edified and refreshed.  This morning Heidi brought up the subject of sanctification.  We talked about ridding ourselves of the world and I tied in some of my thoughts about Kenosis, "self emptying."  We discussed other examples of this principle: and decided that fasting is a form of "self-emptying."  We also "empty ourselves" during physical exercise, we sweat, exhale, and expend great energy to reach a goal.  It was a cool discussion.

At the end of our run, I was able to bask for a few minutes in the most beautiful rays of sunshine.  I think that light must have stuck right to my core because everywhere I went for the rest of the day, my face was beaming.  At the grocery store, each person I made eye contact with would look up at me and smile. At first, I couldn't figure out why everyone was so happy.  Then I realized... oh... they're smiling back.  ;)

Yeah, it was a great morning. And thanks to that...  my whole day was awesome!

Daily Determines Destiny

Like Nephi, "I do not know the meaning of all things" but I do know that God "loves His children" and that He has blessed us with the ability to commune with Him through constant prayer.  "The scriptures are laid before [us]" (Alma 30:44) and we have the words of living prophets to guide us. As we seek, we will find, I know this!  If we seek light and truth, the Lord will guide us to light and truth.  (D&C 88:40-41)

The key is to be spiritually minded:

 "Don’t let something you don’t fully understand unravel everything you do know. Be patient, cling to truth; understanding will come. Trials are like great mists of darkness that can blind our eyes and harden our hearts. Unless we are “continually holding fast” to the word of God and living it, we will become spiritually blinded rather than spiritually minded. Search the Book of Mormon and the words of the living prophets every day, every day, every day! It’s the key to spiritual survival and avoiding deception. Without it, we are spiritually lost." - Elder Kevin W. Pearson (April, 2015 General Conference -Stay By the Tree)

I don't know the meaning of all things.  But I do know that holding to, applying, seeking and studying the words of God must be part of "my every day" and if I do this, I will be guided right. I have been promised that never any day will I need to walk in darkness but will have the light of truth along my journey.  

That Light is available to anyone and everyone who seeks it:

"That was the true Light, which lighteth every man that cometh into the world." -John 1:19

Lead kindly light!  I pray for eyes to see, ears to hear, and a heart that understands the will of the Lord for me in my every day choices. - (Matthew 13:16)

"Our daily discipleship will determine our eternal destiny. Awaken unto God, cling to truth, keep your sacred temple covenants, and stay by the tree!" - Elder Kevin W. Pearson (April, 2015 General Conference -Stay By the Tree)

How grateful I am for a loving Father in Heaven who hears my constant prayers!  He knows my heart. 

-Alicia :)

Friendship,Faith, and Love

Sonya is tall and slender with dark blond hair past her shoulders.  She has the most beautiful blue eyes and a smile that couldn't be more perfect in the magazines.

Sonya and I met during my sophomore year in high school.  We had a drama class together.  That class was cake for her because she was the queen of performance!  You could put any piece of music in front of her and she could not only play it out beautifully with the piano, she also had an angelic voice with perfect pitch and tone to match.  She was naturally animated too, her expressions and mannerisms seemed to be as if she was always on stage.  Needless to say, she had the star role in every one of our high school performances; Steel Magnolias, Guys and Dolls, Bye Bye Birdie, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat, and The Curious Savage.

After high school graduation, I moved in with Sonya's family due to some difficulties going on in my own home.  Her parents, Catherine and Tom, took me in as one of their own, they were wonderful to me! Catherine was a piano teacher for many years, one of the very best.  I could see where Sonya got her musical gifts.  Her sister, Maren, was musical too, a gorgeous opera singer and ballet dancer, as feminine and finespun as a woman could be.  

I remember one day Sonya's dad, Tom, was helping me fix the fuel pump in my car.  I walked through the back door of the house with black and greasy fingers as I made my way over to the kitchen sink.  Maren eyed my hands in horror as she gasped, "How can you stand all of that filth on your fingers?"  

"I had fun," I said as I scrubbed, "Your dad is teaching me a lot."

"Oh, I could never do that!" She poised herself in a ballet-like form and sighed, "I... am a delicate flower."

I laughed out-loud!
I had never heard anyone refer to themselves as a "delicate flower" before and it caught me off guard.  How ridiculous it seemed. I guess I never really cared for nicely manicured hands, especially when it meant getting them dirty from learning something new.

"Oh Maren, you crack me up," I said "Of course you are.  And you never have to change." I patted her endearingly.  

Maren laughed her unique laugh that always made me smile. It almost sounded operatic, so fitting for her personality.

Aw, Maren.... she was awesome.

One afternoon Sonya rushed excitedly up the stairs  into our bedroom and showed me a quote she just discovered. (She knew I loved collecting them.)  

"Look at this one, Alicia.  You're gonna love it!"  She read to me from a little 3x5 card;

"There is no chance, no destiny, no fate, that can circumvent or hinder or control the firm resolve of a determined soul. - Ella Wheeler Wilcox

"Isn't that awesome!" she said. "Let's put it on the mirror in the bathroom and memorize it!"

"Okay!" I agreed wholeheartedly.

Our intention was to use it as our motto to pep us up as we prepared to go out and serve full-time missions.  There was no chance, no destiny, no fate that would stop us from going out into the white and ready field!!!  I met my husband the month before I turned 21 and married him 16 weeks later...so... I guess I wasn't all that "determined" to be a sister missionary. 

I grew to love everyone in Sonya's family.  I also learned that there is no such thing as a perfect home, no matter how ideal it looked on the outside.  Overall, the memories there will always be sweet to me. 

Sonya and I have kept in contact through the years.  She lives in Oregon now and whenever she comes home to visit she gives me a call or stops by my place.  She's much better at keeping touch than I am.  

One particular visit about seven years ago, she confided in me about some struggles she was having in her marriage.  

I referred her to some of my favorite Elder Holland talks and then said, "You know, we are always told to be more Christ-like, to do as He would do, to love like the Savior loved.  And truth be told, sometimes that is harder for me to grasp  I guess because I AM so far from perfect.  I don't know how to be like Him.  But I DO KNOW what it feels like TO LOVE HIM.  I mean, look at the scripture in Matthew for an example,"

"Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these... ye have done it unto me."- Matt 25:40

"Maybe Christ is telling us this  because He knew the concept of 'being like Him' would be hard for most of us to grasp? 

For me, it seems easier to know 'what to do' if we imagine everyone around us as if they were Him.

 What would we say?  How would we act?  

Christ's love changes us.  You see... because we are loved by someone so incredibly amazing, so unbelievable, how could it not change us?

Love is powerful!  Think about it... When you fall in love, you would do anything and everything for the very best interest of that person.  You would serve them and care for them willingly, most gratefully.  You would strive to be your very best self around them and would never want to harm or hurt them in any way.  

Now, what if you took that energy and treated everyone around you as if they were the 'one you loved'?  Can you imagine the impact?!!"

My friend and I talked back and forth about this concept, and she grew more and more excited to put it into practice. 

A year later, when she came to visit again she said, "You know, Alicia, that time you told me about loving everyone as if they are Christ instead of trying so hard to be like Christ was really freeing for me.  It just made more sense, so much easier to comprehend that way!  And it has been working." 

It was wonderful news to hear.

I've been thinking a lot about this concept. I resolve to put it into practice more:

How differently would I treat my spouse, my children, my neighbors, or the stranger on the street if with each of them, I imagined the Savior?  What if in every situation I "did unto others... as I would do unto Him"?  

What a force for good it could be!!

"We have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him.
Herein is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgment: because as he is, so are we in this world.
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear....
..We love him, because he first loved us." - 1 John 4:16-19

Because He Lives and Loves

My peace, my hope, my healer, and friend,

Author and finisher of my faith to the end,

Savior through Thee, I see heaven's view,

Truth breathes in life, my spirit made new,

The grace of Your love flows in my veins,

As my heart sings out, "My Savior Reigns!"

-Alicia Rawlins

Don't Give Up

I don't understand what it is like to be emotionally numb on a regular basis, to go day after day forcing a smile when it seems as if you have absolutely no feeling inside except for the feeling of hopelessness.  I'm grateful I don't suffer from chronic depression but my heart breaks for those who do.  I'm slowly learning that fixing it in others is truly beyond my reach.  Even still, I can continue to love with all that I have and hope it is making a difference in some small way!

This song goes out to my very close and very dear friend whose suffering I cannot comprehend.  I know the Savior comprehends all things though. Please don't give up.  Just one foot in front of the other... You are so much better and so much more than you think you are!

-Alicia

"You Are Loved"

by, Josh Groban

Don't give up

It's just the weight of the world

When your heart's heavy

I will lift it for you

Don't give up

Because you want to be heard

If silence keeps you

I will break it for you

Everybody wants to be understood

Well I can hear you

Everybody wants to be loved

Don't give up

Because you are loved

Don't give up

It's just the hurt that you hide

When you're lost inside

I will be there to find you

Don't give up

Because you want to burn bright

If darkness blinds you

I will shine to guide you

Everybody wants to be understood

Well I can hear you

Everybody wants to be loved

Don't give up

Because you are loved

You are loved

Don't give up

It's just the weight of the world

Don't give up

Every one needs to be heard

You are loved

To the Pure in Heart

"Behold, I... would speak unto you that are pure in heart.  Look unto God with firmness of mind, and pray unto Him with exceeding faith, and He will console you in your afflictions, and He will plead your cause... O all ye that are pure in heart, lift up your heads and receive the pleasing word of God, and feast upon His love; for ye may, if your minds are firm, forever." - Jacob 3:1-2

I read this scripture this morning and just felt like sharing it.  I especially love this part: "Receive the pleasing word of God, and feast upon His love."

Oh, and a nice touch to this would be to read it with a little music.  :)
That's the way I like it.

-Alicia

Love of Learning

         I was given a blessing many years ago that said I would love learning, that it has been something I have loved long before I was born onto this earth and I would carry it with me throughout my life.  It's true!  I love learning with all of my heart and soul!        
         I have thoroughly been enjoying school at BYU.  Last night after a few ours of studying late, I walked across campus, making my way home, and felt an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for this gift I have been given.  Tears welled up in my eyes as I thought of the goodness of God.  I thanked my Father in Heaven for this "dream come true" in my life. What a blessing!  I thank Him every day!
         I absolutely love my Anthropology class!  It's been eye opening to say the least.  I've been completely fascinated with how much there is to learn about myself as I dive into the lives, minds, and cultures of other people.  My instructor is also very hilarious and there hasn't been one day in class yet where I haven't enjoyed a good hearty laugh. He once read a verse to us from The Hawaiian Pidgin Bible and I nearly fell off my seat from the hilarity. It's awesome! (You should check it out.)
    Today, I've been assigned to write a paper in my religion class.  We've been asked to write on just two chapters of the Book of Mormon (anywhere between 1 Nephi 1 to Jacob 7) and discuss character traits and attributes of Jesus Christ.  Although it was hard to decide which ones to choose, I really enjoyed the process.  This has truly been my favorite homework assignment.  I figured I might as well share it here.  It's part of my testimony and will fit nicely on my blog.  So here ya go:

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          In all of scripture there’s not a more beautiful love story found than what is to be discovered in the words of Isaiah.  He speaks Messianically and through him, we learn the intent and heart of God, here the greatest love ever shown is revealed through the principle of sacrifice; not just of body but to the exhausting of heart, might, soul, and mind. To the Jews in ancient Jerusalem, to the Nephites and Lamanites in the new world, and to His modern children on earth today, the message is the same!
          The word “hear” is embedded in the word “hearken”.  Interestingly, it is also found in the word “heart”.  I love this because “hearken” means; listening with our hearts, with full intent to act with willingness to perform what has been required, stemming from Divine love and not out of duty.  In the very first verse of 1 Nephi 20, this is how the Lord calls out to His people, “Hearken and Hear” two words characteristic of a loving plea from our Lord.  He’s begging them and us to please listen, not just with our ears but with our souls, and not just pay attention but to pay strict heed.
         There is great urgency in the context of this call to “listen up.”  Christ is speaking to the baptized members of the church, His covenant people, those who “swear by the name of the Lord” but “do not stay themselves upon [Him]”.(1) He basically says, “Look, I’ve been trying to speak to you from the very beginning, but like a stubborn child you shut me out saying, ‘yeah, yeah I know this already.’  Then you exploit my name so you can call yourselves 'holy' and give credit to your own image and the other false gods you worship.(2)  That’s not how this works. You are following the way of the world and it will only bring destruction.”  Over and over again He begs his people to flee worldliness, to break away from Babylon, to leave their life of pride and sin because there is no peace or happiness in these things and there and never will be.(3)
The Savior with His unfailing love for His wayward sheep tells them of all the blessings that could be theirs if they would just hearken unto Him, the Good Shepherd.  “Then you would have had peace like a river, [and] you would have not thirsted in the desert.”(4)
The people relentlessly reject Him but He continues to warn His children of impending dangers and sends a servant (the prophet)  to help “bring Jacob (His covenant people) again to Him”.  His servant is also rejected and laments, “I have labored in vain, I have spent my strength for naught”.(5)  The frustration of such indifference among the people is palpable and the burden is crushing.  But the Lord in His wisdom reminds the servant that this weight of responsibility “Is a light thing… and [He] will give [him] for a light.” Don’t fret over all the details, I just want you to shine! Trust me, He whose “hand hath spanned the heavens”(6) laying out all the brilliant burning stars and galaxies will “give [his servant] for a light”.(7)
Darkness shrouds the hearts and minds of the people as they sit in the shadowy black cell of their own deception and sin.  But all is not lost. The Lord calls more servants to help the first.  Light always dispels dark “Show yourselves”(8)  is the Lord’s call to those on His errand.   Shine to them who sit in darkness!  The Savior gathers his “light bearer’s” his very elect from all parts of the globe.(9)  Clothed in covenant, like a bride in her gown(10) they will radiate a heavenly glow and they will be given stamina and energy, a swiftness in their step and a song in their heart as they go about His work.(11)  The desolate who sit in waste will lift up their eyes and see redemption breaking through their dark horizon like the rays of the morning sun. And in great mercy they will realize they have not been forgotten, they will come to know the Lord and witness that they have been “engraven upon the palms of His hands”.(12)  Changed by His matchless love, no longer will they hunger or thirst for the things of the world but will find living water in Christ.(13) Through God’s infinite power of His only begotten Son “The captives of the mighty shall be taken away, and the prey of the terrible shall be delivered.”(14)
Unfailing, undaunted, constant, and true in every rejection he continued to offer Himself.  The Lord never gave up on His people and never will, no matter the sacrifice, no matter the cost.  This is a story of the purest and most noble kind of love and it’s true, all of it.

1 -(1 Ne. 20:1,2), 2- (1 Ne. 20:1,2), 3-(1 Ne. 20:20,22), 4-(1 Ne. 20:18, 21), 5-(1 Ne. 21:4,5), 6-(1 Ne. 20:13), 7-(1 Ne. 21:6), 8-(1 Ne. 21:9), 9-(1 Ne. 21:12), 10-(1 Ne. 21:18), 11-(1 Ne. 21:13), 12-(1 Ne. 21:16), 13-(1 Ne. 21:10), 14-(1 Ne. 21:25)

Godly Fear Dispels Mortal Fear

I got up at 4:30 this morning as to assure me some time to finish my homework due for class today.   I missed my regular study time last night to participate in a face to face broadcast with Elder Bednar.  It was a very worthy exchange!  I love Elder Bednar's words!!!  I've been reading his series of books, Increase in Learning, Act in Doctrine, and Power to Become.

I crawled out of bed and went out to my favorite spot in my living room to pray, my little place of treasured communion with my Father.  I had a lot to do within a few short hours but I wanted to start my day off right.  I cracked open the scriptures and read more words on faith and trust, some of which seemed to speak my name, "Prepare your mind [Alicia]. [I] exhort you unto faith and to patience." (Alma 34:3)  

Ah, yes... faith and patience.  I pray for that with all of my heart.

I was blessed to have finished my homework sooner than expected.  This was an answer to my prayer because I was anxious to take a moment to soak up some comforting words and turned to Elder Bednar's recent conference address.  
... Ah, Just what I needed.  

I have shared below the parts that stood out to me the most.  What a blessing that we have this fountain of living water, these words of the living prophets, the scriptures, and our communion with our Father in Heaven through prayer.  They restore my soul!

-Alicia

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Mortal Fear
"The distressing emotion of fear arises because of impending danger, uncertainty, or pain and through experiences that are unexpected, sometimes sudden, and likely to produce a negative outcome.

Fear is dispelled through a correct knowledge of and faith in the Lord Jesus Christ

Nephi declared: “Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life” (2 Nephi 31:20).

The disciplined endurance described in this verse is the result of spiritual understanding and vision, persistence, patience, and God’s grace. Exercising faith in and on the holy name of Jesus Christ, meekly submitting to His will and timing in our lives, and humbly acknowledging His hand in all things yield the peaceable things of the kingdom of God that bring joy and eternal life (see D&C 42:61). Even as we encounter difficulties and face the uncertainties of the future, we can cheerfully persevere and live a “peaceable life in all godliness and honesty” (1 Timothy 2:2).

We can be blessed to hush our fears as we receive the fortitude that comes from learning and living gospel principles and resolutely pressing forward on the covenant pathway."

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Godly Fear

"The righteous fear I am attempting to describe encompasses a deep feeling of reverence, respect, and awe for the Lord Jesus Christ (see Psalm 33:8; 96:4), obedience to His commandments (see Deuteronomy 5:29; 8:6; 10:12; 13:4; Psalm 112:1)

Godly fear “is the beginning of knowledge” (Proverbs 1:7), “the instruction of wisdom” (Proverbs 15:33), a “strong confidence” (Proverbs 14:26), and “a fountain of life” (Proverbs 14:27).

Godly fear is loving and trusting in Him. As we fear God more completely, we love Him more perfectly. And “perfect love casteth out all fear” (Moroni 8:16). I promise the bright light of godly fear will chase away the dark shadows of mortal fears (see D&C 50:25) as we look to the Savior, build upon Him as our foundation, and press forward on His covenant path with consecrated commitment.

I love and revere the Lord. His power and peace are real. He is our Redeemer, and I witness He lives. And because of Him, our hearts need not be troubled or afraid (see John 14:27), and we will be blessed to hush our fears." 

- David A. Bednar (Therefore They Hushed Their Fears)

The Essential Element of Faith

In my studies this morning I appreciated the scriptures Alma shares in his sermon to the Zoramites from the words of the prophet Zenos.

After the Prophet Alma gives his beautiful clear-cut sermon on faith, there were still many who did not understand his words.  He tells them that they "ought to search the scriptures" and that in their searching of the scriptures, they would find that the Prophets have taught them over and over again "to pray" not rambled muttering, but sincere and meaningful prayer.  Prayer is essential in making our hearts receptive to the word of the Lord.

Alma asks the bewildered crowd, "Do ye remember to have read what Zenos, the prophet of old, has said concerning prayer or worship?  For he said:

Thou art merciful, O God, for thou hast heard my prayer, even when I was in the wilderness; yea, thou wast merciful when I prayed concerning those who were mine enemies, and thou didst turn them to me.

Yea, O God, and thou wast merciful unto me when I did cry unto thee in my field; when I did cry unto thee in my prayer, and thou didst hear me.

 And again, O God, when I did turn to my house thou didst hear me in my prayer.

 And when I did turn unto my closet, O Lord, and prayed unto thee, thou didst hear me.

 Yea, thou art merciful unto thy children when they cry unto thee, to be heard of thee and not of men, and thou wilt hear them.

 Yea, O God, thou hast been merciful unto me, and heard my cries in the midst of thy congregations.

 Yea, and thou hast also heard me when I have been cast out and have been despised by mine enemies; yea, thou didst hear my cries, and wast angry with mine enemies, and thou didst visit them in thine anger with speedy destruction.

And thou didst hear me because of mine afflictions and my sincerity; and it is because of thy Son that thou hast been thus merciful unto me, therefore I will cry unto thee in all mine afflictions, for in thee is my joy; for thou hast turned thy judgments away from me, because of thy Son.  - Alma 33:3-11

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It says six times in those few verses that God "did hear" or"will hear."  Then Alma asks the people, "Do you believe those scriptures?"  He's basically stating again, "It's faith, brothers and sisters, pure and simple faith!  That is the element you are missing! But you are not even willing to believe enough to pray sincerely about these things, to search it out, or to open your hearts just a little bit.

The Savior said, "If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth." - Mark 9:23

What an awesome promise! I know it's true!

As I read those verses in Alma 33 on prayer, a sense of gratitude washed over me for this simple and basic principle.  The sweetest part of my everyday is when I kneel to pray.  Like Zenos, I rejoice with all of my heart that wherever I go and wherever I am, I can pray and the Lord will hear me every single time!  I know this!

- Alicia

Secret Prayer

"There is an hour of peace and rest,

Unmarred by earthly care;

'Tis when before the Lord I go

And kneel in secret prayer.

May my heart be turned to pray,

Pray in secret day by day,

That this boon to mortals giv'n

May unite my soul with heav'n."

Text and music: Hans Henry Petersen, 1835-1909

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My song for the day!  :)
I will stand my ground where hope can be found!

Take two and call me in the morning.

Several weeks ago, a friend of mine confided in me about some heavy burdens she was carrying.  Wearied and weighed down, she opened her heavy heart to me.  I listened to her sincerely and then told her about a couple of Elder Jeffrey R. Holland's talks that had been a great strength to me during my own times of need. (1 & 2)  I encouraged her to listen to both of them and jokingly said, "Take two and call me in the morning."

Though my physician reference was just for play, I was serious about the instruction.  She did listen to the talks and the next day called to thank me,
"Those were just what I needed!" she said with an audible relief in her tone.
I quickly responded, "Don't thank me.  I've been in the very same boat as you and all I did was share some of what got me through.  Thank our Father in Heaven that He has these 'glimpses of hope' provided for us during our burdensome journey."

...............

In that same spirit, I feel to share two verses and two songs for any other soul out there who might feel burdened or heavy-hearted:

Here are the two verses:

"I [the Lord] have heard [your] groaning... and I have remembered my covenant."

"Wherefore say unto [you], I am the Lord, and I will bring you out from under the burdens... and I will rid you out of [the] bondage, and I will redeem you with a stretched out arm..." - Exodus 6:6,7

Now here are the two songs...  Close your eyes and just listen.  I pray this brings a "glimpse of hope!"

PSALM 23

I testify that God is very aware of us and hears our every prayer.  "He is my strength and my song!"

He will carry us through every difficulty and lead us to green pastures.  I know this!

- Alicia :)

Revelation RX

An old African-American spiritual has two lines of irrefutable truth:

"There is a Balm in Gilead,

To make the wounded whole."

We had a lesson in church a couple of weeks ago on revelation.  We read the definition in the Bible dictionary and there were two words that seemed to jump out at me, "prescribed course".

"The principle of gaining knowledge by revelation is the principle of salvation. It is the making known of divine truth by communication with the heavens and consists not only of revelation of the plan of salvation to the Lord’s prophets but also a confirmation in the hearts of the believers that the revelation to the prophets is true. It also consists of individual guidance for every person who seeks for it and follows the prescribed course of faith, repentance, and obedience to the gospel of Jesus Christ. “The Holy Ghost is a revelator,” said Joseph Smith, and “no man can receive the Holy Ghost without receiving revelations” (HC 6:58). Without revelation, all would be guesswork, darkness, and confusion.

In the Lord’s Church the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve are prophets, seers, and revelators to the Church and to the world. In addition, every person may receive personal revelation for his own benefit. It is contrary to the laws of God for any person to receive revelation for those higher in authority (see D&C 28:2–8; 100:11; 107:91–92)." - Bible Dictionary "Revelation"

Just as a physician gives prescriptions in order for the patient to obtain certain results, our Father in heaven has given us a prescription, a rule or course of action to be followed, in order to receive personal revelation.

This is a liberating concept to me because in all my numerous weaknesses and shortcomings, the Lord still promises that I can commune with Him.  It's "prescription" not "perfection" that brings the results.

I believe the Lord desires to answer me in those things I have fasted prayed earnestly about.  He wants me to continue to seek for the meaning of those puzzle pieces in my life.  I sat there with my scriptures in my hand and read the words "prescribed course" over and over again.  I said a prayer in my heart, "Lord, as I have searched out these answers, I know I have followed the 'prescribed course' with all the sincerity of my heart! And in doing so, I was guided to specific scriptures and talks that applied perfectly and..." Before I could begin to ask all my questions again, the sweet assurance of the spirit almost interrupted me and said, "...and you received personal revelation. You can lay it down Alicia that you've received your answer."

I'm so thankful for the power of prayer, for scriptures, and for the comforting influence of the Spirit in my life. They are medicine to my soul! I do not need to know the end from the beginning.  I just need to follow the prescribed course one day at a time; love, serve, give, pray, study, apply, try, repent, forgive, and repeat.

 I trust my Physician.

Ere you left your room this morning,

Did you think to pray? …

When your soul was full of sorrow,

Balm of Gilead did you borrow

At the gates of day?

"And my soul hungered and I kneeled down before my Maker and I cried unto Him in mighty prayer and supplication for mine own soul; and all the day long did I cry unto Him; yea, and when the night came I did still raise my voice high that it reached the heavens."

"I cried unto Him continually, for He had said unto me: 'Whatsoever thing ye shall ask in faith, believing that yea shall receive in the name of Christ, ye shall receive it."  - (Enos 1:4,15)

-Alicia

You Give and Take Away

"Blessed Be Your Name"

Blessed Be Your Name

In the land that is plentiful 

Where Your streams of abundance flow

Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name

When I'm found in the desert place

Though I walk through the wilderness

Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out 

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name

When the sun's shining down on me

When the world's 'all as it should be'

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name

On the road marked with suffering 

Though there's pain in the offering 

Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out 

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away

You give and take away

My heart will choose to say

Lord, blessed be Your name

by, Tree63
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2HYuQiruOio

The Secret to Life

 "I wanted to tell you, that song 'Major Tom'... 

That song is about courage and going into the unknown. It's a cool song." 

- Cheryl Melhoff (The Secret Life of Walter Mitty)

Last night, we watched it again. This makes it the the third time we've watched this movie as family and I'm pretty sure it won't be our last.  Every once in a while a show comes along that strikes so many chords in me, I can almost hear my heart sing in tune. This is how I feel about Mitty.  I loved it the first time I saw it.  To me, everything about this movie is absolutely genius! It captures the magic of discovery; of dreams, of true beauty, of courage, of relationships, and of course... life.

Life's motto is powerful, it's all about vision, about perceiving with new eyes and a new heart.

“To see the world, things dangerous to come, 

to see behind walls, draw closer, to find each other, and feel 

- that is the purpose of life.” 

I love that!  It's the courage to step outside of our own little sphere and see the bigger picture, to explore the souls of others, to take a leap of faith, to seek understanding, and make lasting connections.  

One of my favorite scenes in this movie is when Walter is faced with the decision to jump on board of the departing helicopter. He has only a few seconds to make the pivotal move. His mind reflects on Cheryl, he can feel her faith in him like a surge of energy that puts his whole body into motion. Her mere influence instantly gives him courage to run for it and to grab hold of the opportunity that awaits him. Once aboard the helicopter, Walter knows that there is no turning back.

As the story unfolds we continue to see how Cheryl's influence sparks something within Walter Mitty.  Every thought of her ignites the embers of his hopes and dreams into a miraculous blazing reality. He starts to become who he has always wanted to become.  It's a side of him that has always been there but just locked away, lying dormant until awakened by purpose, by hope.  That's the power of love.

"Somewhere in your make-up (perhaps in the cells of your brain) there lies sleeping, the seed of achievement which, if aroused and put into action, would carry you to heights, such as you may never have hoped to attain." Once this "genius which lies asleep" is awakened by love, it will "drive you upward to whatever goal you may wish to achieve."  -Napoleon Hill

"Love is, without question, life's greatest experience.  It brings one into communion with Infinite Intelligence." - Napoleon Hill

Nothing could be more true!!  I believe this is why God is so powerful, because He is love personified.

"Friendship is a spiritual thing.  It is independent of matter, or space or time.  That which I love in my friend is not that which I see.  What influences me in my friend is not his body but his spirit.  He influences me about as much in his absence as in his presence."

- Henry Drummond

There's a quote I discovered  just over 20 years ago and I've never forgotten it. I believe it is a key that unlocks the heart in a way that is vibrant, full, and rich, brimming over with meaning... 

"Live to learn, learn to love, and you'll love to live." - Matthew Cowley

That is the secret to life!

- Alicia

"Stay Alive"

by, Jose Gonzalez

There's a rhythm in rush these days

Where the lights don't move and the colors don't fade

Leaves you empty with nothing but dreams

In a world gone shallow 

In a world gone lean

Sometimes there's things a man cannot know

Gears won't turn and the leaves won't grow

There's no place to run and no gasoline

Engine won't turn

And the train won't leave

Engines won't turn and the train won't leave

I will stay with you tonight

Hold you close 'til the morning light

In the morning watch a new day rise

We'll do whatever just to stay alive

We'll do whatever just to stay alive

Well the way I feel is the way I write

It isn't like the thoughts of the man who lies

There is a truth and it's on our side

Dawn is coming 

Open your eyes

Look into the sun as the new days rise

And I will wait for you tonight

You're here forever and you're by my side

I've been waiting all my life

To feel your heart as it's keeping time

We'll do whatever just to stay alive

Dawn is coming 

Open your eyes

Dawn is coming

Open your eyes

Dawn is coming

Open your eyes

Dawn is coming

Open your eyes

Look into the sun as the new days rise

There's a rhythm in rush these days

Where the lights don't move and the colors don't fade

Leaves you empty with nothing but dreams

In a world gone shallow

In a world gone lean

But there is a truth and it's on our side

Dawn is coming open your eyes

Look into the sun as a new days rise

What good are words... if we don't MOVE?!

Everyone has their opinion of what makes great music.  My favorite is the kind that not only gets me moving but points me in the right direction.  I absolutely love the feeling of discovering a new song to add to my list.  I really like this one not just because it makes me want to "bust-a-move" but because I can relate.

When I share my testimony, when I write, when I pray, when I give praise to another...  it will all be nothing more than words if I don't show it through what I do.  It is all in vain if it doesn't come from my heart.  It's so easy to "talk the talk."  But if I'm not practicing what I preach, "What good are words?"  I want to be the one who walks the walk!

It's time to move my feet, baby!

- Alicia

Make a Move

by, Royal Tailor

Mr., good intentions, 

So much I wanna do.

My mouth just keeps on running,

But I never follow through.

I heard that true religion, 

Is love with hands and feet.

I wanna find my own way, 

To reach a world in need.

I've been, captured by the unimportant.

Locked in, and now it's time to break free

There's more to life,

Open my eyes.

Someone is needing You.

So I gotta Make A Move.

What good are words,

When this world hurts.

Real faith will come through.

When I Make A Move.

We don't need permission,

To go outside of these doors.

And dream some crazy dream,

No one else has dreamed before.

To show love and compassion.

Where ever way it may be.

To put faith into action,

Do more than just believe.

We are, 

Hope to those who have been broken.

We were,

Made to make a difference, Made to make a difference.

There's more to life,

Open my eyes.

Someone is needing You.

So I gotta Make A Move.

What good are words,

When this world hurts.

Real faith will come through.

When I Make A Move.

"Ask in Faith" - Ensign, May 2008, 94-97 - David A. Bednar
"True faith is focused in and on the Lord Jesus Christ and always leads to righteous action. The Prophet Joseph Smith taught that “faith [is] the first principle in revealed religion, and the foundation of all righteousness” and that it is also “the principle of action in all intelligent beings” (Lectures on Faith [1985], 1). Action alone is not faith in the Savior, but acting in accordance with correct principles is a central component of faith. Thus, “faith without works is dead” (James 2:20).

The Prophet Joseph further explained that “faith is not only the principle of action, but of power also, in all intelligent beings, whether in heaven or on earth” (Lectures on Faith, 3). Thus, faith in Christ leads to righteous action, which increases our spiritual capacity and power. Understanding that faith is a principle of action and of power inspires us to exercise our moral agency in compliance with gospel truth, invites the redeeming and strengthening powers of the Savior’s Atonement into our lives, and enlarges the power within us whereby we are agents unto ourselves (see D&C 58:28)." - "Ask in Faith" - Ensign, May 2008, 94-97 - David A. Bednar

Puzzle Piece Perspective

My dad used to always counsel me, "You can't see the forest for the trees."  As a young teenager, I didn't understand what he meant by that.  Of course, it's obvious to me now, he meant I lacked perspective.

I don't know how much I cared whether or not I had correct perspective back then, but now I hunger and thirst for it... I pray for it! I desire with all my heart to see clearly.  I want to see with the Spirit and not with my own eyes. - Jacob 4:13

I'm so thankful for prayer.  What an amazing listener our Father in Heaven is, I have so much to learn about that wonderful quality!  Prayer is my healing balm, my lifeline, my connection to my Truest Friend.  (Some may speculate in the ability to communicate with heaven but I've had too many experiences in my life that confirm the validity of prayer and I cannot deny it.)  My questions need answers, my soul needs direction, my hurt needs healing, my eyes need vision, my heart needs changing, and I know He is mighty to bless me with all of this and more.

The Savior taught: “Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, which is right, believing that ye shall receive, behold it shall be given unto you” (3 Ne. 18:20). “Pray always, and I will pour out my Spirit upon you, and great shall be your blessing” (D&C 19:38).

The Apostle James encourages, “The … fervent prayer of a righteous [person] availeth much” (James 5:16). 

What does fervent mean?  It means intense, sincere, impassioned, and heartfelt.  Have you had prayers like that, so intense that you feel as if the very flesh of your heart is being torn? I have.  It may not sound pleasant to some but I honestly cherish such moments in prayer only because I know I'm in the safest possible place to be so raw and exposed.

In the scriptures we are commanded to "pray always." How is this done? Alma 34:27 teaches us to keep our prayers in our hearts, “When you do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you.” 

Prayer is the key that unlocks the door of revelation.

President Boyd K. Packer counseled, "Learn to pray. Pray often. Pray in your mind, in your heart. Pray on your knees. Prayer is your personal key to heaven. The lock is on your side of the veil. And I have learned to conclude all my prayers with 'Thy will be done'" (Matthew 6:10; see also Luke 11:2; 3 Nephi 13:10).

In direct answer to my prayers yesterday, I was led straight to a talk from conference all about perspective.  Interesting that my Heavenly Father would give me the same counsel my earthly father gave me so many years ago.  I guess I still have a lot of growing up to do.

The story of my life is like a gigantic jigsaw puzzle.  Through prayer I have laid all the pieces across the table.  I graciously thank my loving Father in Heaven for the exciting opportunity of putting together this picture of my life with Him.  He watches over me and gives me help as I ask.  There's an amazing sense of satisfaction when I find pieces that snap perfectly into place, knowing just how and why they relate, revealing more of the bigger picture.

Then I have this group of other pieces; I know they are part of the puzzle, I've held them, examined them closely, and searched for their appropriate position.  I can see the colors and style of cut match with the overall puzzle. I know they belong in the big picture somehow, so I hang on to them. Sometimes I gaze at them for hours...  for the life of me, I cannot see how they can even be possible. I want to find their place!  Like a child, I grow frustrated and discouraged and cry out to my Father, "I don't want to deal with these pieces anymore! I don't know where they belong!"
He lovingly tells me, "Then don't try to make them fit right now, Alicia, and don't quit or throw these ones away either.   Keep putting together the pieces you do understand and one by one, over time, you will see exactly how these other ones belong in your life and you will know right where they go. Be patient."
This brought me comfort.  I pray for patience.

In this same talk Elder Rafael E. Pino shares a story about the raw marble and how the sculptor sees the finished piece:
"As the sculptor was chiseling a block of marble, a boy came every day and watched shyly. When the figure of David emerged and appeared from that stone, complete for all the world to admire, the boy asked Michelangelo, ‘How did you know he was in there?"

This was also what I needed to hear and caused me to recall the lyrics to my Masterpiece, the song I played over and over and memorized into my heart so many years ago.

I love how personal my Father in Heaven is.  I love and cherish the power of prayer.  I thank Him for His devotion to such an impatient soul.  He gently guides and lovingly listens.  He has provided me with His words through scripture, through His servants, and through the Spirit of revelation.  What an invaluable truth!

-Alicia

"By the Power of His Word" - Spiritual Creation

As a family, we just finished reading Jacob chapter 4.  I love the verse where it says, "For behold, by the power of his word man came upon the face of the earth, which earth was created by the power of his word" - Jacob 4:9

What I love is this part... "created by the power of his word."  I believe this is another way of saying that they were "spiritually created first".

God created all things spiritually before they were naturally upon the face of the earth (see Moses 3chapter heading; Moses 3:5–7; see also D&C 29:31–32; Abraham 3:22–23).

To be created “spiritually” appears to have at least two meanings: to be planned in advance, and to be formed as a living being with individual identity and a spirit body (see Moses 3:5–7; see also Moses 3:19;6:51).

This fascinates me...  if we are to "become even as He is" then I believe God wants us to learn for ourselves not just the power of "His word" but the power of our own words when righteously used.

Creation Through Prayer
Our words = what we speak in heartfelt prayer, our desires, our hopes, our dreams, gratitude spoken, praises, prayers on behalf of others, etc.
His words = Personal revelation, spiritual enlightenment, whisperings of the Spirit

Creation Through Scripture Study 
Our words = the notes we take, sharing what we've learned through testimony,
His words = scriptures we ponder upon and allow to change our hearts, ancient and modern prophets, promises that give us hope, understanding of who we are and what God expects of us

Creation Through Covenants
Our words = keeping the promises we make "our word becomes our bond." We become persons of integrity
His words = "I the Lord am bound when ye do what I say" - God is a promise keeper.  We can trust that with full confidence.

.............

Even if a person does not believe in God they cannot help but acknowledge "the power of words" for good or for evil.  Our communication: what we speak, what we write, what others speak, what they write, how they listen and how we listen is very powerful!  This is where creation begins! The words we choose to use among our brothers and sisters on this earth create things spiritually first and then form into something physical.  The examples are everywhere around us.

It causes me to wonder... What are we "creating" with our words?
"Everyone plays a piece"... lets make it "glorious".

-Alicia
Our First Language

Learning CharACTer

When working through difficulties or particular challenges, how often have we heard the phrase, "This will be good for you, it builds character."

What is character?

It is the sum of the soul.  It is the qualities and attributes that make up one's personality, who they truly are. It is character that determines destiny, NOT appearances, prestige, popularity, or circumstance.  

How is character reveled within each of us?  Martin Luther King taught, "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."  

In Lectures on Faith, Joseph Smith described that one of the three things "necessary in order that any rational and intelligent being may exercise faith in [the Father and Son] unto life and salvation is a correct idea of [Their] character, perfections, and attributes:" (page 33)

How do we gain a correct idea of the character of Christ?  We observe and study His life and His teachings... but there's more to learning than just studying, it must also be by faith. - D&C 109:7

"Faith is a principle of action... Faith in Jesus Christ is the first principle of the gospel and is more than belief, since true faith always moves its possessor to some kind of physical and mental action."

 -Bible Dictionary 

There's an old saying that you never truly understand a person until you've walked a mile in their shoes.  In order to understand the character of Christ, we must "walk a mile" in His shoes, we must try to be like Him in whatever circumstances.  Learning to walk in the footsteps of the Savior doesn't happen overnight.  The Lord is patient with us just as a father is patient with his children when they attempt to take their first steps.  Every time they stumble, he encourages them to keep trying and his heart is overjoyed with every success.  It requires constant effort and God is proud of all who are sincerely and genuinely doing their best.   

Learning the character of Christ requires acting out what we learn.  And in order to "act" out what we have learned from our great Teacher, we must be given circumstances that test us and try us.  Because of this knowledge, I am grateful for the challenges that confront me.  Challenges are opportunities for me to exercise my agency, to practice in faith/action what I have learned by study.  

Learning the CharACTer of Christ comes from acting as He would act, from practicing over and over what He would do.   

I am genuinely grateful for a loving Father in Heaven who is incredibly patient with me.  He doesn't scorn me when I stumble but sees it as a "good fall" because he sees my heart, He sees I'm trying.  The faith He places in me stirs within my soul a greater love and admiration for His character, I have a greater desire to become as He is.  So I'll keep learning, keep practicing, keep trying, and through His amazing grace, I won't just walk, I'll run!

"Live your life to be a good example of what you believe—in word and deed. How we live our religion is far more important than what we may say about our religion.

Our Savior’s Second Coming is drawing nearer. Let us not delay in this great cause. Remember Captain Moroni, who hoisted the title of liberty inscribed with the words “In memory of our God, our religion, and freedom, and our peace, our wives, and our children.”  Let us remember the people’s response: exercising their agency, they “came running together” with a covenant to act.

My beloved brothers and sisters, don’t walk! Run! Run to receive the blessings of agency by following the Holy Ghost and exercising the freedoms God has given us to do His will." 

- Elder Robert D. Hales

(Also see - The transforming Power of Faith and Character by, Richard G. Scott)

One thing I really love about this video is it's not just a loving father who encourages but also loving brothers and sisters.  How thankful I am for my brothers and sisters in the Gospel who cheer and inspire me every step of the way. Oh how I love them!

-Alicia